Published on 12, July, 2020
Hello.I am a middle-aged man and I now realise and accept that I have Aspergers. I am self diagnosed (I hope that counts). I will not be getting a medical diagnosis as I don’t see the point at my age. I have spent my entire life struggling to fit in with little success. I have never mentioned my newly realised Autism to anyone, and possibly never will. I am terrified of the reaction. I mask as much as possible, but struggle to keep it up sometimes. Most people just think I’m weird. I at least have a job and am financially self sufficient, so I have survived.
I joined this community in the hope that I could offer some useful advice or comments. I will do my best.
Steadman said:I have never mentioned my newly realised Autism to anyone, and possibly never will. I am terrified of the reaction.
The more enligtened and caring people will want to know and be curious on what it means, including how they can help you.
The vast majority have a "so what?" approach which is also valid. It changes nothing for them so why would they care.
A tiny minority of ill informed people will treat you like you are a lesser person as in their minds they equate autism with the non-verbal autists with significant needs.
Like dealing with all these sorts of people in life, appreciate the good ones and tell them so, treat the majority the same as before and for the minority - well you will always have these useless idiots to deal with in life and ignoring them is probably the simplest thing to do.
Try to ease off the masking and become more authentic whenever practical - it is good for your mental health. Most people won't care if you show a bit more "personality" anyway, and you will find it gives back more energy than it was taking to do in the first place.
Welcome to the club!