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When coping starts to fail

Just some guy you know

Hi Folks 

I have just joined the community here as I am currently looking for help with work (see Online work meeting difficulties - is it just me?) and hope someone else here can share some experiences / evidence to help negotiate with work.

Meantime, a bit about me ...

- I have be living with comms issues and dissociation for over forty years
  ... while (successfully?) masking for the best part of thirty?

- I see myself as sharing more experiences and characteristics with a "female" style of autistic spectrum condition (ASC)
  ... having read "Shy, nerdy and socially inappropriate"

- I have a range of coping mechanisms that help me, from remembering names to managing social interactions
  ... but they all take energy, and have become harder and harder to use over the last 3-4 years

- I am now in the position over the next week/month/year of moving out of the family home, fighting for my job, and having to rebuild family relationships with my own kids, siblings and parents
  ... all as a result of an ASC?
  ... or adverse childhood experiences (ACE) ... which may or may not have resulted from an ASC?
  ... or type II bi-polar, characterised by regular depressive episodes (or ASC burn-out?) followed by "hypo" mania (ie. being overly well / over energetic / over doing things)

On the second point, I am not sure what the "community view" (not that there is just one view?!) 
... is of using a gendered short hand to talk about people's ability to mask, avoid public melt-downs
... and all those other things that Cynthia Kim talks about
... and I am happy to learn if people want to discuss it

All the best
Just some guy

ps. Fwiw, the name comes from one of my fave cultural reference points - the Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy (HHGTTG)
... and is deliberate misquote of

"Well, Zaphod’s just this guy you know"

pps. Another fave HHGTTG quote is ...

ZAPHOD BEEBLEBROX THE FOURTH:
If ever you find you need help again… you know, if you’re in trouble, need a hand out of a tight corner…

ZAPHOD:
Yeah?

ZAPHOD BEEBLEBROX THE FOURTH:
…please don’t hesitate to…

...to get lost!

 

  • in reply to Just some guy you know

    Thats an interesting read. The post titled 'Alone' pretty much describes my life.

    Accept now being alone is so much less accepted. To earn a living I have to join a company and be part of a culture whether I agree with it or not.

    Now as a parent I am bombarded with situations where I'm surrounded by noise, and I have repeated daily instances of small talk and rebounding episodes of eye contact with kids, parents, carers etc.

    I'm currently laying in the dark after being unable to sleep since 2am (it's now 12:43pm) after the overwhelm that follows a weekend away, and the ongoing news of AI depleting the sector of jobs that I work in.

    The demands of the world come at me all at once and I just can't cope with more than 1 or 2 a day, my body starts to break down and I have Crohn's disease that flares up.

    Previous to this, I had a good period of stable work, and a calmish start to the year where I was pretty happy and able to smile much more. So I hope spring brings more of that

  • ps. Cynthia Kim's blog - which is a good read, and was a starting point for their book - is called and can be found under ...

    Musings of an Aspie