Why get diagnosed?

Hi Aromere,

I could have written this post myself alittle while ago..

Here is where I ended up.

I wanted an official diagnosis for closure and for validation or confirmation because certain behaviours are common or typical for AS and the way you are structured would explain it, but if you are an NT then these behaviours might be a result of something that you need to drill down into and explore, maybe even work on or watch out for etc.

There is no drawback I can think of to an official diagnosis unless you feel that "you can't handle the truth" whatever that may be, right?

However, (and this is important!), Getting diagnosed doesn't equal declaring it to the world, this is a secondary step you must consider carefully because once they know, they can't unknow!

But sharing that information can only happen after a diagnosis.

Hope that makes sense. Good luck on deciding, but please share your decision and your train of thought making it.. I am very curious.

Thanks

They would be based on your own needs. For me, I might ask for my shifts to be in a block, or for somewhere quiet to sit as lunch if I was to work a whole day overtime. I can ask not to work on certain areas if they cause me any distress (too many people, or a need to be excessively social for example). There are many possibilities, and as long as you are still doing the job you’re contracted to do, there’s no harm done. 
If I was in an office, I might request not to be seated in the middle of the room, or not to have to change desks for example. If I was light sensitive, I could ask for different lighting at my desk for example. 

Hi Aromere, I have very recently been diagnosed. I don't know if it is relevant but I am 60 years of age. The reason I share this is  I am not sure if my reaction to my diagnosis is age related. Whilst waiting for a diagnosis I honestly wasn't bothered what the result would be. After all what difference would it make to me. I was being supported by psychological services for long standing mental health problems. I was slowly getting better I felt. Receiving the diagnosis that I am autistic is the worse thing that happened to me. I wish I had never gone for the test. I have been discharged by the MH team as my issues are to do with autism. Although diagnosed I have not been told how they reached that conclusion. The report states I may experience this or I might experience that. I don't know what I can associate to long term mental health or which bit are caused by autism. I don't know if mental health issues are a misdiagnosis. I am lost. I don't who or what I am. I am once again becoming increasingly low. Mental health team clearly won't help and no support for adult autistics. I have been patroniisingly told at that the autism diagnosis will explain 'things'. I'm afraid it doesn't. For example do I have social anxiety or is it an autistic trait, or a combination of the two, if an autistic trait does that cause the social anxiety. Will the therapy I have practised over several years still work or is it pointless because there is little I can do because I'm autistic. I feel this might not be a common view but it is mine. My point is that there may be a 'dark side'. Hopefully you won't experience this but please be aware it might be there. 

Thank you for your thoughts. 

Your comment about needing to know what was you and what was ASD really resonates with me. 

May I ask what kind of adjustments at work there are available? 

I don’t think you need to struggle to warrant a diagnosis. My life has always been more difficult than others, and I’ve never felt like I fit in. The older I got, and whatever I did to improve and work on myself, nothing changed. As I got my 40’s I adopted a don’t give a sh*t approach, and tried to just push through things. However, when I had my thunderbolt moment, and subsequently decided to go for assessment, it was because I ‘needed’ to know. I was sick of wondering about it. I need to know so I could start to find out who I was, because I thought I knew. Obviously not. I had my own personality, but what was me, and what ASD? 
Because I have the diagnosis, I can ask for adjustments at work. I’m ok, but things change all the time and I might need to get some small changes put in place. Especially if I apply for a new job.

On the outside, I have been married, I’ve had children, I drive, I’ve had many good friends in the past, I spent years nightclubbing, I work in customer service, I have been self employed for many years successfully in the past, I hold down a job, I’m intelligent, eloquent and very capable, very creative, and I can turn my hand to anything.  On the other side of that I can be anxious, I have been depressed throughout my life, I’m a perfectionist, I hate social situations, and leaving my comfort zone, my home. I get tired, I mask, and I’ll have meltdowns or shutdowns if I don’t give myself lots of down time. 
My diagnosis had no negatives. I would say it was the best thing I’ve actually done for myself.

Thanks Jay for your thoughts on this.

I completely understand that if you’re struggling with things in life, then seeking a diagnosis is the right thing to do.

I’m starting to realise that perhaps the reason I don’t think I struggle as much is because I engineer things to not put myself in situations which could cause me to struggle.

Wish you all the best in getting your diagnosis.

Hi,

I might not be the best person to advise as I’m also not diagnosed but I thought I’d share my view for what it’s worth  

Your story sounds familiar, especially some of the social aspects. I am currently seeking assessment in the hope that it helps me to understand why I struggle in life, mainly with dreadful anxiety. So I would say that if you have any difficulties in your life or even if you just feel like you could be happier, then it might help.

I definitely understand the can of worms issue as that’s where I am right now. Dealing with these things can take a toll but I’m hoping it’s worth it in the long run. 

I’m also managing to hold down a fairly responsible job, a family and all that stuff but for me it’s at the expense of my own mental well-being. 

Good luck with whatever you decide.

Jay

Thank you for your comprehensive reply, it is appreciated.

I have my doubts whether I am autistic as I suppose I am high functioning, work in finance and manage people, have children and a partner. 

However I have cut myself off from my family for over 10 years (apart from my parents), and I have little interest in making new friends, mainly because I don’t see the point and get bored of small talk. I have no hesitation in cutting people out of my life if they “wrong” me and I’m incredibly black and white about this. I suppose this is the area I would like to explore further to see if there is a reason I am like this. 

I completed an autism questionnaire I found on someone’s post on here and I scored 33 which suggests I may be autistic.

My main concern is getting a diagnosis may open up a can of worms for me personally, and I’m not sure how I would benefit overall. 

From a personal pov being diagnosed is incredibly useful. Firstly I don’t do self diagnosis so the official assessment gave a sort of green light to genuinely investigate autism. Secondly the official report came with a tailored set of recommended reasonable adjustments which are taken seriously in a way self diagnosis isn’t, so an immediate and really life important consequence is that communication with my gp surgery has improved out of all recognition. Their comms are designed entirely for NT people and were so inpenetrable to me that I hadn’t attended the practice for a long time, armed with the official documents I physically went there and spoke to the admin manager who fixed my problems very quickly and has set up comms channels tailored to my autistic needs. This is hugely important as at last Im getting the consultations and investigations I need and which might yet secure intervention for a life threatening condition.