Do I have Autism or an NVLD (or both)?

Hello

I'm 30-something suffering from the sort of burnout that really makes me think I might be on the autistic spectrum.

When I was 16 I took a dyslexia test and the psychologist just stopped shy of diagnosing me with a non-verbal learning disability (NVLD). She found a big difference between my verbal and performance IQ but basically said I was so high functioning that I didn't really need many accommodations.

I thought that was that and that I was basically OK. I've always known I was different to other people but I've generally found my own ways to cope. Recently, however, I have been feeling increasingly burnout at work and unhappy. It occurs to me that the dyslexia test focused on my IQ/learning ability and not the other areas of my psychology. I do a lot of weird things that are a bit autistic-y, if that makes sense. My Mum is pretty sure l must be on the autistic spectrum and even says I'm just like the character of Sheldon on the Big Bang Theory.

Here is a list of some of my historic and current strange behaviours; could they be signs of autism or even another form of neurodivergence?

1. I cannot form deep or meaningful relationships with other people. In other words I cannot bond. I don't know how to explain it but I can see that other people connect with each other and I can't do that. My family have always said it's because I'm too shy or don't try hard enough to make friends but, even though I can get on well with some people, I just can't form any sort of attachment. Personally, I don't see this as a problem, as you can't miss what you've never had, but other people seem to think it's an issue. I generally work to hide this from strangers and casual acquaintances so that I don't look like a weirdo or loser. 

2. I keep to a really strict routine and don't like it when I have to alter it. Altering my routine makes me so uncomfortable that I've been avoiding visiting my family for the past year or so as I know it will involve staying up later or eating at different times.

3. I cannot estimate time correctly. You make think this means I'm regularly late for things but quite the opposite, I'm always ridiculously early. I tend to think that I'm going to be late and so give myself far more time than is needed to get anywhere. To put this in context, I used to arrive at university lectures 20 minutes early and I currently get into work before 7:30am (I'm usually the first person in the office). 

4. I consciously and unconsciously compare my behaviour to others and copy their behaviours and mannerisms. When I was a pre-teen I unknowingly copied the way my babysitter ran; I'm sure I did this sort of thing more regularly but I actually realised it on that occasion. Sometimes I do it knowingly; when I was very young I used to study my classmates when they were drawing so that I could make sure my drawings looked right.

These are just some of the strange things I do. I would like to figure out whether I'm on the spectrum as I know it should inform how I treat my burnout. I did ask for an assessment referral from my GP but they said there is a 3 year waiting list and that counciling would be a better option for me. 

I think my issue is, that whatever I have, I am very high functioning so I can sort of muddle through life until something comes up that I really can't handle. Now that I'm in my 30s I think I need to be more intentional about the coping strategies I create as some the ones I've used in the past aren't working anymore.