Published on 12, July, 2020
I was diagnosed with ADHD at a young age, but not much was done for it other than helping with my school life. Now, I am an adult and have talked to my doctor. He and I both think I may very well be autistic. I have been researching for years and have come to this conclusion.
Now, I am in a bit of a mess. I find myself questioning whether I am interacting with other people properly. I lack most social skills and have trouble understanding why other people act the way they do. I have severely hurt a friend, and this has been a huge wake up call to get serious help.
Currently, I do not know what I can do. I keep telling myself I want to join groups on my campus, or meet new people, but I am terrified to do so and always chicken out at the last second. I thought it would really help me to interact with more people, but I cannot bring myself to actually do it.
What can I do? Has anyone else gotten past this problem? I feel the obvious answer is to just do it, but it feels so much more complex than that. I'm desperate to become better, I want to stop hurting people around me because of this problem.
You can improve your non-verbal communication skills by acquiring what is instinctive in neurotypicals, intellectually. Research facial expressions and body language, there are resources online. This will help you decode the signalling going on around you. After that, you can only improve your social skills further by socialising, there is no work around. Try to run the things you intend saying though your head first, and think, "If someone said that to me, would I be upset or offended by it?"