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Hi

SuffolkAutistic

Hey everyone, just thought I best dive in and say hello. I'm 42, married mother of one, recently diagnosed. Happy I've finally some explanation as to why I've always felt different. Not entirely sure how to undo decades of masking and feeling like a bit of a fraud asking for reasonable adjustments because to all and sunder I appear 'normal', but I guess it will come with time and a greater understanding of self. 

Is anyone else here a parent to a non-autistic child? My daughter is six and I would love to find some books or videos I could share with her to help her understanding of why I find 'mummy-stuff' quite difficult. A lot of the information for parents (beyond the help sheet on this website) seems to be aimed at those who also have autistic children.

Many thanks

Parents

  • Hi and welcome,

    I only had 16 years of masking to undo and that was quite difficult so must be even harder for you. don't feel like a fraud asking for adjustments, it's about time that you get the support that you deserve. you may be able to act 'normal' but that doesn't mean that you should have to.

    I'm not a parent however I work in a library so i can recommend some books which might be some help, the book 'my mummy is autistic' might be a good place to start.

    Also 'my friend eddie', 'i see things differently: a first look at autism', samantha cotterill has a book series on senses, 'do you want to play?'  are all picture books about autism which could start a conversation on the way your autism affects you. they are also quite nice books to read anyway, so even if it doesn't affect you personally not the worst idea to read them together anyway. it will mean she has an understanding of others with autism as well.

    without knowing what you find particularly difficult it is hard to recommend much. if you struggle expressing your emotions then i would recommend watching 'inside out' with your daughter and explaining that you have all the emotions that she can see but sometimes you aren't sure which one you feel or how to show people that's how you feel. 

    Alisha xx

    P.S. feel free to private message me if you ever want to chat

Reply

  • Hi and welcome,

    I only had 16 years of masking to undo and that was quite difficult so must be even harder for you. don't feel like a fraud asking for adjustments, it's about time that you get the support that you deserve. you may be able to act 'normal' but that doesn't mean that you should have to.

    I'm not a parent however I work in a library so i can recommend some books which might be some help, the book 'my mummy is autistic' might be a good place to start.

    Also 'my friend eddie', 'i see things differently: a first look at autism', samantha cotterill has a book series on senses, 'do you want to play?'  are all picture books about autism which could start a conversation on the way your autism affects you. they are also quite nice books to read anyway, so even if it doesn't affect you personally not the worst idea to read them together anyway. it will mean she has an understanding of others with autism as well.

    without knowing what you find particularly difficult it is hard to recommend much. if you struggle expressing your emotions then i would recommend watching 'inside out' with your daughter and explaining that you have all the emotions that she can see but sometimes you aren't sure which one you feel or how to show people that's how you feel. 

    Alisha xx

    P.S. feel free to private message me if you ever want to chat

Children
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