• Replies 8 replies
  • Subscribers 69 subscribers
  • Views 1303 views
  • Users 0 members are here
Options
Related
Hints and tips
  • To quote someone's message, first select/highlight the relevant text, and then use the Quote button that appears
  • To "mention" someone, type @ followed by the start of the forum name, and choose from the list; that person will get a notification of being mentioned

Oh all 6 year olds do that.

Wendy Woo

Hi, my first post but I am sure I am not the first to ask this question. Our son has been diagnosed AS since he was 3, though we knew what was wrong way before that. We have lost count of the number of friends and family that seem to think there is nothing wrong. I think I will scream if I hear one more person say "all boys do that" or "well he's only 6" as if the particular behaviour being discussed is completely normal. We just don't seem to be able to convey how his condition diplays itself. For the most part he just comes across as being a naughty or rude boy and is prone to outbursts if he does not get his own way. Most people do not see what we have to deal with because we work so hard on his behavior. I think peoples comments are meant to make us feel better but at the end of a stressful episode you would like them to try it for a week and see if they still think he is just "being a boy". This has turned out to be more of a rant than a question, the main thing being, if anyone can sum autistic spectrum in a nut shell please give me a hint.

Parents

  • Hi Wendy Woo.

    I understand what you are describing. I am not a parent but a  25 year old woman who is on the autistic spectrum. I get this all the time: people do not understand!!. Even people who work in the autism field, like support workers, sometimes don't really get it. Why would they? They do not live with it every day, but at least they try to understand. The same cannot be said for many people, though. They continue to come out with things that make our lives misery, particularly because we already often have self-esteem issues. For example, I volunteer at Age UK every Monday, for 4 hours straight, on a busy till. I began volunteering here on my own initiative, to satisfy my need to do something meaningful, and with which I can be proud. I also have a 7 hour a week paid job, the first proper job I have ever had.

    Anyway, last week I was 10 minutes late for Age UK, and this was not caused by laziness but because of extreme chronic anxiety, causing tiredness, as well as exhaustion caused by constant noise at my new flat - neighbours, car noise etc. This would be stressful for anyone, but having Aspergers magnifies the stress 10 fold. The manager said, ''we were beginning to worry about you, did you oversleep?''. I told her that I have been very tired because of being so busy with my job and new flat. She then said, 'well I work a 37 hour week and still manage to come in on time''. I told her that I also have anxiety to contend with, and was almost in tears at this point because I try so hard, and it felt like I was being criticised. She knows I have Aspergers, but I don't think she can really understand how draining life is for me.

Reply

  • Hi Wendy Woo.

    I understand what you are describing. I am not a parent but a  25 year old woman who is on the autistic spectrum. I get this all the time: people do not understand!!. Even people who work in the autism field, like support workers, sometimes don't really get it. Why would they? They do not live with it every day, but at least they try to understand. The same cannot be said for many people, though. They continue to come out with things that make our lives misery, particularly because we already often have self-esteem issues. For example, I volunteer at Age UK every Monday, for 4 hours straight, on a busy till. I began volunteering here on my own initiative, to satisfy my need to do something meaningful, and with which I can be proud. I also have a 7 hour a week paid job, the first proper job I have ever had.

    Anyway, last week I was 10 minutes late for Age UK, and this was not caused by laziness but because of extreme chronic anxiety, causing tiredness, as well as exhaustion caused by constant noise at my new flat - neighbours, car noise etc. This would be stressful for anyone, but having Aspergers magnifies the stress 10 fold. The manager said, ''we were beginning to worry about you, did you oversleep?''. I told her that I have been very tired because of being so busy with my job and new flat. She then said, 'well I work a 37 hour week and still manage to come in on time''. I told her that I also have anxiety to contend with, and was almost in tears at this point because I try so hard, and it felt like I was being criticised. She knows I have Aspergers, but I don't think she can really understand how draining life is for me.

Children
No Data