Sleep/iPad dependency/anger I could go on!!!

When I were your son's age I reacted to things violently myself.

Psychiatrists and psychologists don't get taught everything there is to know about autism so there is limitations from support services. That's why I've studied autism for over 20 years, so I can share what parents don't get taught.

You were probably told about physical senses been heightened or reduced, if your son has heightened or reduced senses that can be why he's doing his best to avoid the weather. Some autistic adults I've listened to share that when their senses rise it can be unbearable. The feeling of the wind, trees blowing can be irritating to him. Over and under sensitivity is also a reaction to overstimulation.

The psychiatrists don't get taught the neuroscience to autism and this is what helped me understand my differences better. In those of us on The Autism Spectrum our "amygdala" has additional activity and it's the "amygdala" that controls the "fight or flight" hormone, that's why we can become anxious more easily and regularly, how active varies between each of us, some live on medication for anxiety and/or depression their whole life.

The autistic brain also functions in a systematic way explaining things like routines, uncomfortable with changes, prefer controlled environments where things are more predictable. Since he can be uncomfortable with changes, that's another possible reason he's disturbed by the weather as it's always changing, but when the sky is plain he doesn't see the changes.

Making adaptions that can make the environment more aligned with his natural way of functioning can be a help, but there's no guarantee it will solve everything.

Hi,
cbd is something I need to look into tbh, so I will give that a go.

thanks for the drama coach idea, I personally don’t think it would be something he’d engage with, he rarely even leaves the house. Getting him to go anywhere is virtually impossible. 

I'm surprised they gave him an anti-depressant which is not the same as anti-anxiety. I wonder why they do this. Can you look into CBD for him?

I tried to think of ways to help my son son feel as though he had the ability to be in control of decision-making. This way he was occupied with his own 'responsibilities' within limits when young. 13 can be difficult at best. 

As for vocalisation, to be honest, an interesting approach could be finding a drama coach. They can teach mindful techniques for conveying information and make it enjoyable. And also help with social techniques depending on where he's at. Even if it's once a month, giving him tools to practice with until the next session might be a solution? You could probably find a coach at drama schools. Art + Therapy for Autistic Children is a becoming a good route for graduates and hopefully will become a far more of a useful part of society eventually.

Hi, 

thanks for your reply. 
so I believe the reason behind sleeping in the day has a lot to do with weather. His anxiety around the weather is off the scale, can’t cope with wind, clouds, rain….basically anything that isn’t blue sky and sunshine. So in order to never see that he’s got himself in the pattern of sleeping during the day hours so he can avoid it all completely. I’ve tried to wake him, to keep him up on sunny days, nothing seems to work. He will just stay awake all day and night and crash the next day. 
as for shouting at his iPad, it’s just general chit chat along with whatever he’s watching, not angry shouting- just his voice volume level is off the scale! 
he’s been to see a psychiatrist recently, that review was as good as it could have been considering it was raining that day, he was prescribed fluoxetine…..which doesn’t seem to have made much difference at all with his anxiety levels. 
he does need to be in control of everything, and if I challenge this it can result in physical violence, smashing of things he can grab, throwing anything he can find. 

Jess,

When did the sleeping problem begin and what was happening around that time? Changes of behaviour are usually reactions to something a nonautistic person would not react to, and the reactions can be as unusual as this. 

Some people on The Autism Spectrum, the more overwhelmed or overstimulated they are, the more they try to control. They try to control the environment by trying to keep it consistent. With the iPad being a stimulant that is probably what's overstimulating him since he's on it all day. 

See if you can identify why he's shouting at the iPad, he's probably going to keep shouting until the iPad does what he wants it to do. If he can't control his anger something like anger management might help, it will just be difficult getting him to go by the sounds of things.

The more information you can gather about what's lead your son here, the closer you'll be able to get to the root of the problems.