Hi everyone,
I have a 21 yr old son with aspergers, diagosed in his childhood. He also has epilepsy and dyspraxia. Am a single mum, my son does see his dad on a regular basis although he's as useless as a chocolate tea pot.
We're going through some real issues just now. School was obviously always such a struggle and although I fought a constant battle to get him statemented, it never happened, however he did have open access to the learning support team. When he left school, he tried college but that didn't last long, about 6 weeks. I managed to get him onto a course for kids with specific needs, Aspergers, depression, some learning support needs but he found even this difficult to deal with and that too didn't last long.
Has had a few short period jobs but nothing has lasted longer than a couple of months. More recently, he decided he wanted to return to college to do catering. I was so proud of him for going and he'd come home and talk to me about what he'd done and his mood lifted so much. It was so lovely to see.
Over the last few weeks, I've noticed that he's reverting to his usual ways of being withdrawn, isolated, started sleeping about 18 hours a day and staying in his room for very long periods of time again.
I became concerned that he'd not been attending college, even got to asking him what he'd been doing and he'd tell me all about the things he'd cooked, learnt etc however, it was confirmed last week when college actually phoned home to ask why they hadn't seen him since mid November. This all happend around the time his father moved about 100 miles away, so, a big change for my son to deal with.
Am pretty sure he didn't tell me as he didn't want to disappoint me but it escelated out of all control and he didn't then know how to tell me he wasn't going. Although college know of his problems, my son refused any help/learning support and has always been in total denial of his condition.
He's been at his dad's since I found out and therefore haven't said anything to him, but, he's home tonight and of course I'm going to have to speak with him. My initial reaction was anger, but of course, I'm not going to shout and scream, this isn't goin to help. I know he'll try to deny it all, he'll cry, he'll go to his room for a few hours and will probably not speak to me for a day or so.
He has no source of income and, although I do work full time, I do find it really hard financially, especially his train fare to college, he obvioiusly need clothes and toiletires etc and likes to have spending money which I really can't do.
I'm lost for finding help and support for him, if he'll actually accept it. No idea where to turn and having to cope and deal with this on my own.
sorry it's long, I have tried to keep it to a minimum!
Thanks for reading
Bas x
