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hi folks

mummy123

well i am a mum of four, aged 15 to 23. i have an 18 year old daughter recently diagnosised with aspergers, and my 22 year old son and 15 year old son are on the verge of being confirmed as being on autistic spectrum.

i am interested in family link as i believe my mother, undiaganoised , is probably having aspergers and two cousins on that side of family have been diaganosised since childhood.

 

i am really struggling as i imagined my children would have been growing up and becoming increasingly independant and i would be getting my life back where in realty because they are struggling to fit in the adult world they are becoming more reliant on me and i find myself emotionally and physically exhausted.

 

gracex

Parents

  • Hello mummy123,

    I'm new here, your story sounds similar to my parental home, except neither I nor my brothers have been diagnosed (I am currently planning on undergoing diagnosis soon, I don’t think that my brothers are on the ASD spectrum), however I’m the only one that flew the coup, I’m 28 and the eldest.  The thought of my brothers 'hanging around' though worries me as to the drain it has on my parents mental resources.

    Have your children gone to uni?  Did they enjoy having the independence if they did or are they thinking about it?

    When I left home I was fine surviving at uni, the structure and opportunity to have my own space I controlled (even though I was sharing with others) with my room was great.  It being acceptable that I can shut my way away and study uninterrupted was a god send – maybe this is something they could look forward to?

    When you say they are struggling to fit in to the adult world what do you mean?  Is it work related and getting steady jobs or is it to do with managing housekeeping and bills etc?

Reply

  • Hello mummy123,

    I'm new here, your story sounds similar to my parental home, except neither I nor my brothers have been diagnosed (I am currently planning on undergoing diagnosis soon, I don’t think that my brothers are on the ASD spectrum), however I’m the only one that flew the coup, I’m 28 and the eldest.  The thought of my brothers 'hanging around' though worries me as to the drain it has on my parents mental resources.

    Have your children gone to uni?  Did they enjoy having the independence if they did or are they thinking about it?

    When I left home I was fine surviving at uni, the structure and opportunity to have my own space I controlled (even though I was sharing with others) with my room was great.  It being acceptable that I can shut my way away and study uninterrupted was a god send – maybe this is something they could look forward to?

    When you say they are struggling to fit in to the adult world what do you mean?  Is it work related and getting steady jobs or is it to do with managing housekeeping and bills etc?

Children
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