Hello. I am 53, have been diagnosed as having Austism 3 months ago. My wife works and I have not had a job in over 7 years, I just cannot seem to get a job. I digress, anyway I have been married for nearly 2 years now. Things have got to breaking point. My wife says she is drained and cannot give anymore to this relationship. The problem is I do not talk a lot at all. I am very introverted, my wife is the opposite of me. When she talks to me about her day I just cannot seem to think of anything to say in response to her. Nothing comes into my head to respond. It is so frustrating. I do not know what to do so I can talk easily to her. Has anyone got any suggestions for me please.
I have moments like this, for example, when I spend time with my OH's mother I used to want to ask her questions to get her to reveal more about what she's been up to, e.g why did she enjoy her theatre trip, but I froze. To overcome this I looked up possible questions on the internet and put these in my phone. I used to pop to the loo to look at it when I needed support
Thank you for your reply. I will try your idea. Having not really talked a lot to anybody for my whole life only about what I'm interested in, I just find it so hard to know what to say. I tend to give one word answers back when I need to elaborate more.
Thank you again for your help.
You seem to write well. Can you write her a daily bulletin? Could be fun.
Also she needs to listen to what you do say and give it due consideration.
I would like to apologise for her on behalf if all women who talk too much ;)
Write down some open-ended questions that let her talk more while you giving her the impression that you give a f***. Things like:
Oh, that sounds interesting - did you go on your own?......
I've thought about doing that too - what's involved?....
Fascinating - how much was that?.....
I really like this cake- where did you get it?.....,
Why did 'XXX' say that?......