New here, and newly diagnosed!

Hello everyone!!

I'm Mae (though calling me by my username is okay too!!), I'm a 20 year old female and just had my final autism assesment yesterday, in which I got my diagnosis. I saw that this forum was mentioned in one of the leaflets I was given so I decided to come check it out!! I look forward to talking with you all and sharing experiences on this journey

A little bit of background info on my diagnosis journey- I originally saw a community mental health team as my depression was becoming particularly bad at the time, and they brought up the possibility of autism and referred me for my assessments. At first I was actually surprised. Even though I have lived with depression and anxiety since my early teens, I have always felt that I had something alongside those but could never quite figure out what it was. I always felt that my brain didn't quite work in the same way that everyone else did, that I was always on the outside looking in, and no amount of help with my depression and anxiety could resolve those 'unknown' issues. I started feeling extremely helpless and isolated as nothing ever seemed to work out okay for me. I felt like a failure. Which obviously fed into the depression.

Honestly, I hadn't read much about autism before the community mental health team mentioned it. I actually thought I maybe had ADHD instead, or a personality disorder. I did have passing thoughts about potential autism, but assumed I wouldn't have it as I had read only very generalised and very little information. However, when I actually read into it, particularly on the topic of how autism often presents in females, and read about other people's experiences, it really began to dawn on me how similar much of what I read was to myself and my experiences.

So here I am today, newly diagnosed. I am still honestly finding it difficult to process as it's such a revelation. But at the same time, I am so relieved that I can finally get the correct support and finally try to understand why I struggle so much with things that neurotypical people find easy. Since I finished college at 18 I have become extremely 'stuck' in life. I've never been employed, haven't yet been able to attend university, and every attempt at volunteering fell apart quickly. My life is very messy at the moment, but with this new information I'm really hoping to build up to a life I love.

I really hope this wasn't too long for a self-introduction, but it really helped to write all this out and clarify my own feelings for myself. I look forward to talking with you all!!