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Hello- I am new :)

LadyLovesTravel

Hello everyone.

I just wanted to say hi, I am new. I am a 47 year old mother of three including a very handsome 13 year old son with Epilepsy, Learning difficulties and Autism.

It has not been an easy 13 years, especially (as is so often true for many of us) where schooling is concerned. My son has found school difficult and it has been extremely stressful fighting with local authorities getting support.

I have always been an advocate for "gentle parenting" I brought up my two eldest now 25 and 18 this way but found my youngest, much more of a challenge. However, I am proud to say all three have been brought up without me or my husband ever laying a hand on them. I have an Honours degree in Psychology and Human Behaviour, and I also have a post Graduate in Mental Health and Counselling with a particular interest in behaviour and de-escalation techniques yet I dont work, I am a full time mother and carer for my son.

I'd also like to say that I am passionate about what I feel is blatant overuse of restraint and seclusion- especially in schools. I am seriously considering a UK-wide campaign including a petition to the government about harmful restraint and seclusion- I want it banned!

I hope everyone is well and would welcome your thoughts. Enjoy the summer Smile

  • Hello and thankyou for your kind comments Indie Girl, but I am not amazing at all, I'm just a mum trying to do her best. Smile

    I did my degree and PG Cert to get the knowledge I needed in order to try and understand my sons condition and get him the right support. I got sick and tired of so called professionals making all sorts of assumptions and weird and wonderful diagnoses for my son from "severely mentally retarded" (he read at 4 years old and his IQ was over 160!) to Dyslexia, Hyperlexia, PDD and Fragile X Syndrome.

    I dont want you to think that I am against teachers and schools- thats not the case at all, but my own small (then) 11 year old child was brutally injured two years ago by teachers in a special school claiming to be "trained" using "CALM. Actually what they really did was slam my son to the ground face down then FOUR teachers basically held him there (sat on him) until he couldnt breathe, passed out, urinated, suffered internal bleeding and had to be hospitalised. This happend THREE times- although the school will only admit to two incidents. Over the three days of abuse, he also had 63 bruises. If I had done this to my child I could have been jailed- why then is it ok for teachers to do it?

    There is a difference between guiding and turning a child or keeping them safe using the least restrictive method possible and prone/suppine restraint which can be deadly. Many schools do not follow the rules and children are being hurt, and unless you as a parent have the time and financial means to take the abusers to court, there is absolutley nothing you can do about it.

    There are other ways, and I think it's time for a change in the way some schools deal with challenging (communicative) behaviour from special needs children. I agree with you that harmful restraint and seclusion is unnecessary.

    I admire you Indie Girl for working with teenagers who have autism and challenging behaviour, especially as you have a son yourself with Aspergers. You are the amazing one, not me Smile

    Good to meet you and I hope we can chat again soon.

  • Wow, you sound amazing!

     

    I have a 14yr old son who has Asperger's syndrome and I work as a teaching support assistant with teenagers who have severe autism and display some very challenging behaviours. We are all fully trained in SCIP-R and I agree that harmful restraint and seclusion is unnecessary. I think training, knowledge and understanding is important throughout every school, special needs or mainstream.