3 days after my 13 year old son has been diagnosed

Or try Tony Attwood's website which is http://www.tonyattwood.com.au/ if I've got it right or just search Tony Attwood. The website has a section "about aspergers" which is nicely calmly written to explain things without making anyone feel uncomfortable.

There's a nice expression that people sometimes use when describing aspergers - "there's nothing wrong with me - its everyone else that's the problem".

This is true to an extent. Aspergers affects social communication/interaction and therefore is picked up on by other people who find the person with asperger's different or out-of-step (or maybe slightly rude, or inappropriate, or tactless, or moody/morose.....or a number of perceptions that usually other people aren't sure about.

The problem lies with the social communication/sensory/organisational and other difficulties caused by having aspergers. But the problem is other people reacting to this. Most people with aspergers don't feel that they are necessarily the ones with the problem.

That's not selfishness (or lack of empathy as is sometimes suggested). But people with aspergers are usually trying their best to fit in but getting seemingly unfair reactions and maltreatment they cannot comprehend.

So he may not feel that putting the problem down to him is fair. He may feel other people ought to try to be more accommodating.  Admittedly someone with aspergers could be seen as very difficult or uncooperative. But it is due to factors they cannot easily alter.

Try not to make it seem like the label means it is all down to him. Because there's not a lot he can do about it.

Or try Tony Attwood's website which is http://www.tonyattwood.com.au/ if I've got it right or just search Tony Attwood. The website has a section "about aspergers" which is nicely calmly written to explain things without making anyone feel uncomfortable.

There's a nice expression that people sometimes use when describing aspergers - "there's nothing wrong with me - its everyone else that's the problem".

This is true to an extent. Aspergers affects social communication/interaction and therefore is picked up on by other people who find the person with asperger's different or out-of-step (or maybe slightly rude, or inappropriate, or tactless, or moody/morose.....or a number of perceptions that usually other people aren't sure about.

The problem lies with the social communication/sensory/organisational and other difficulties caused by having aspergers. But the problem is other people reacting to this. Most people with aspergers don't feel that they are necessarily the ones with the problem.

That's not selfishness (or lack of empathy as is sometimes suggested). But people with aspergers are usually trying their best to fit in but getting seemingly unfair reactions and maltreatment they cannot comprehend.

So he may not feel that putting the problem down to him is fair. He may feel other people ought to try to be more accommodating.  Admittedly someone with aspergers could be seen as very difficult or uncooperative. But it is due to factors they cannot easily alter.

Try not to make it seem like the label means it is all down to him. Because there's not a lot he can do about it.