Diagnosed Yesterday

Hi Trainspotter,

Thanks for your observations. It's a really good point that left to ourselves, we can just be ourselves, but when others try to fit us into their world, that's when the problems begin. NTs do seem to see the world in their way, and want to control others. I constantly feel out of step with others, but I'm completely happy with that - it's the others who have the problem, not me.

Although I'm in a period of adjustment, of being diagnosed with an ASD, I'm happy with it too, because now I have an answer. Perhaps even more important, I don't want to change behaviour that would appear strange to some, but I do want to have help for areas in which I do have problems relating to other people. Having the diagnosis will help others to understand and modify their behaviour, which will make my life easier.

Hi Telstar.

It took me some time to come to terms with my diagnosis.  Not that I thought it changed anything but because I kept thinking on what might have been had I got my diagnosis years earlier.

I have found everyone I have told very supportive, but the main thing is that I now feel I can be myself without having to worry about not fitting in.  I have stated before in other posts that when left to myself there is not and never has been a problem to me with my autism.  I may have strange ways of expressing myself, i might make movements which seem odd to others at times, I may be abrupt and not very sociable, tut thase are not a problem to me if I was left alone.  The problem is caused by others making judgement on what I do, trying to fit me into their way of thinking and their way of doing things.  And that is a world which I have never and will never fit.

I believe the world is big enough for eveyone's characteristics, thoughts and ways of doing things (provided of course they do not harm other people).  But NTs seem to have this inbuilt resistance to difference and want to control others.  And that is the biggest problem with my being autistic - I do not take well to being controlled by others especially if I can see problems with what they are trying to do.

It might be a strange thing to say but I actually enjoy being autistic.  And I would certainly not want to take some pill or have some operation or go to some therapy which would take what I consider to be an essential part of me away.

Sorry, I posted here in error.

Thanks all for your kind comments.  I'll answer them in one post which will be easier than doing individually.

Animalhouse - yes, it has been a long time, but it was worth it! I didn't have any previous contact with mental health or had any counselling. I found out by researching autism one night, because my sister is a teaching assistant with children with autism, and I wanted to know more about the subject. I saw the AQ test online and completed it, and was surprised to find my score was 40, which showed me as "autism likely" (I retook it just before my assessment and the score was 42).  After doing some other tests which showed similar results, I got a referral and was put on the list for an assessment, though I was told that in our area there was a long waiting list. I read up more about the subject, and was more convinced it was the answer to some of issues I'd had throughout life, especially problems with communication at work. Now, after 21 months, I finally have the answer, and can hopefully use that discovery to help me in the future.

I'm sorry to hear of the problems you're having with anxiety and depression, hopefully the counselling will help you. You'll always have us here to listen to you on the forum if things get difficult for you, likewise with your children. Hope things improve soon.

Stephen, thanks for your thoughts, it seems that many of us are in the same position, not knowing why we have the problems we have, until we find out later on.

James 2015, thanks for your thoughts too, which are very uplifting, and it's good that we can take our traits and turn them into positives too. I hope more is done especially in the area of employment, so that our full potential can be used, and we can benefit.

Thanks all! I'm still taking in the fact I now have an ASD diagnosis. I told my extended family today via social media, and all have been very supportive. Together with the comments on this forum, I'm feeling more positive about things than I have for a long time.

Telstar, welcome.

I fully understand your feeling of relief on receiving a diagnosis. I clearly remember that when mine came through a couple of years ago, at the age of 58. It also brought me focus. All of a sudden my eyes were opened and I could see which pieces of advice to follow - and which to ignore. For the first time in my life I was able to see that my peculiar traits could me used as strengths,  that there were things I could do differently that would mean I could get along better with people around me, that I can be confident,  that I am NOT the not nice person I thought I was.

Take your new diagnosis as an open door to life as you really are - a life of great potential, of clarity and of strength.

Getting my diagnosis did finally provide an answer to why I felt and acted like I did as well. Glad you have an answer to.

Welcome to the forum!

wow thats a long time.  do you mind me asking if you had any other services or meetings such as counselling/mental health before finally getting a diagnosis.

i have my suspicions and one of my children has a diagnosis and i suspect the other has although now she is older she has chosen to go for counselling and medication route to help with anxiety instead at the moment.

i myself have been having counseeling for depression/anxiety following a break up of a long term relationship and am realising how dependent i was on other person and my suspions about myself are becoming stronger as i am really struggling.

i have hid behind being self employed all my working life so have not had to deal with work issues in the past.

what made you finally go down diagnosis route.