Hi all,
I have not yet begun the journey of assessment with my son but wanted to join here to speak to other parents and carers about how to communicate my worries effectively. I am concerned that I will not be taken seriously with my views on my son's behaviour.
I recently spoke to a health visitor about his tantrums and she put it down to frustration that his language was not developing as expected and not to worry. Since then his language has developed considerably (thanks to more socialisation) but his behaviour is as bad as ever and when he get's anxious/upset it seems he forgets how to communicate even basic things.
We have had an unsettled life, especially over the last few months (I was in an abusive relationship and in a refuge for 4 months, we are now in our own home; he,his sister and myself) and I know this would contribute to any child's behaviour issues but my son's behaviour has been worrying from around the age of 10months.
- He reacts disproportionately to negatives: If he's told not to do something or he can't have something he will have a "meltdown" and there is no reasoning with him. He bangs his head, throws things, lashes out and has recently started scratching his nails down walls/doors and biting himself if particularly stressed. If something happens that he's not quite expecting or isn't the way he wants it he gets incredibly upset, tearful and aggitated.
- He walks on tip toes all the time.
- If he wants something he becomes obsessive about it, repeating himself over and over and has recently started tapping himself on the cheek as he repeats himself.
- If excited he shakes his head and hops or jumps.
- If he's playing with building bloack he builds the same tower every time. It's an elaborate construction but always the same. He also lines the rectangular bricks across the floor and says it's "beautiful".
- He lines his cars up next to eachother and says "race" but does not move them, just looks at them, every time he plays with them.
- He is obsessed with the same few toys/games/foods.
- He is 2 1/2 and does not sleep a full night still, he wakes at least 3 times taking a minimum of 20minutes to be settled each time.
- He does not respect people's personal space.
- He lashes out for attention (either at the person he wants attention from or at another child/nearby person)
- He does not seem to understand directions when told ("pick that *object* near the *object* up and bring it to mommy" he will pick up random objects up and show them to me like "this one?" Whereas his 16month old sister who can not speak will complete this kind of task) but he remembers walking directions (to the local shop or bus stop which we regularly go to)
- He talks/sings to himself constantly.
- He has an unusual rhythm to his speech, it can be quite stilted, especially if he is trying to construct a sentence himself, he can also stutter when doing this. Most of his speech is "echolalic", made up of phrases he has heard around the home or on tv. (He says "dot com" a LOT.lol)
- He does smile and have a sense of humour but struggles to inerpret change of mood: tone of voice/facial expressions, especially on adults.
I'm finding his tantrums and sleep problems increasingly difficult to deal with and wish to convey to my new GP that I think there is a greater issue than the outside influences on his life. Do these behaviours seem familiar toanyone else or am I overreacting to these things? He is a clever and loving boy in many ways but that side of him rarely shines through.
Any advice would be appreciated.
Andie x
