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Diagnosis confusion and moving forward

Chichi

Hello!

I am a 24 year old woman, and I was diagnosed with asperger's syndrome recently (4ish weeks ago). I'm not sure though that the diagnosis fits, and will help with the difficulties I have.

I definitely have problems with executive function. I get sidetracked, I struggle to finish things. I have plenty of ideas, but somehow they don't come together. When I was at Uni mum would try and get me to write out timetables for getting essays done. I couldn't do it, I had no idea how long  doing each bit would take, and it would depend on things, like whether my brain was playing ball that day. And when she wrote one for me, I would loose it. Being unable to concenrate, and actually finiish things is an on going issue. Caaffeine helps, as does having deadlines.

There are some things that don't fit with the asperger's profile. I've always liked group interactions (Less pressure to contribute, can zone in and out). I'm no really detailed orientated, my essay feedback was always that I neded more indepth stuff. I need context for a lot of things, and my problem has always been having too many interests and ideas, and not being able to choose betwen them. I don't think I have any special interests, unless you count reading and stories.

I'm not sure I have any kind of sensory issues (sometimes the pitch of someone's voice or laugh will grate), or stims (sp?) (skin picking maybe? I also tend to pace about, it helps me think). I can do polite conversation, and I can talk with people I know well. It's just the bit in the middle that I find difficult.  

I have tried to talk to people around me about these doubts, but they say it's normal to have a period of denial/adjustment, and that Asperger's is a spectrum. And I am at the very mild end of the spectrum- my tests were just under the diagnostic level, it was my assessor who aid she thought I did, on the basis of our interview. I do't think I'm in denial?

I'm fairly new at this, so I wanted to ask, does anybody else have experience of these kind of issues? Any tips or resources would be gratefully appreciated.

Thank you

Parents

  • We're all individuals with different aptitudes and needs. I'm a female Aspie in my 50s, and I'm now good at organisation and detail orientated. I am distracted by certain sounds and can often hear small sounds others miss. I have minor touch/skin sensitivities - can't wear too tight clothes or high heels, have to cut most labels out of my tops. Getting a comfortable bra is a nightmare. I like one to one interaction with people I trust, but generally find groups both boring and anxiety inducing, if that makes sense? 

    But, as a girl and young woman I was different in many ways. I liked groups then too - particularly organised ones - it made me feel included and enabled me to learn the rules of interaction. I liked helping and teaching others too. I also found getting organised difficult, particularly at school, did as little homework as possible, and sometimes lost stuff. I didn't do well academically - it was all too much for me. I would retreat to my room and play guitar when I needed a break. My biggest interest was also books and reading, and I liked music and animals too.

    As an adult I studied for a while with the open university - I did well the first year, but when I went on to level 2 I also got told my essays lacked depth, which made me frustrated and depressed as I couldn't work out what was required, and so I gave up.

    As a child I would have laughed if you had told me I was going to end up working in accounts (I was going to be a vet!) But I'm quite content doing that now, in a role where I can plan my work myself and don't have anyone "looking over my shoulder" so to speak. Accounting, like language, has patterns I can identify more quickly and easily than most people. The structure is reassuring, I know what is expected and my creative streak works out solutions to problems others often don't see.

    I've had to learn to organise myself over the years - routine helps. Timetables don't always help, as if you don't get things done on time it can be off putting. I find writing lists helpful - the items can be organised into most important to least important, or if none are that important, they can be ranked by how interesting they are. Sometimes doing more boring things first is better, as it gets them out of the way so you can enjoy the more interesting stuff.

    Women with aspergers are often not recognised as having it. Do a Google search for attributes of female aspies. You'll learn more about yourself as time goes on and you'll learn how to cope. At least you have a clue why you are like you are - I didn't until less than a year ago, and it's been a steep learning curve. Very interesting though.

    All the best

    Pixie

Reply

  • We're all individuals with different aptitudes and needs. I'm a female Aspie in my 50s, and I'm now good at organisation and detail orientated. I am distracted by certain sounds and can often hear small sounds others miss. I have minor touch/skin sensitivities - can't wear too tight clothes or high heels, have to cut most labels out of my tops. Getting a comfortable bra is a nightmare. I like one to one interaction with people I trust, but generally find groups both boring and anxiety inducing, if that makes sense? 

    But, as a girl and young woman I was different in many ways. I liked groups then too - particularly organised ones - it made me feel included and enabled me to learn the rules of interaction. I liked helping and teaching others too. I also found getting organised difficult, particularly at school, did as little homework as possible, and sometimes lost stuff. I didn't do well academically - it was all too much for me. I would retreat to my room and play guitar when I needed a break. My biggest interest was also books and reading, and I liked music and animals too.

    As an adult I studied for a while with the open university - I did well the first year, but when I went on to level 2 I also got told my essays lacked depth, which made me frustrated and depressed as I couldn't work out what was required, and so I gave up.

    As a child I would have laughed if you had told me I was going to end up working in accounts (I was going to be a vet!) But I'm quite content doing that now, in a role where I can plan my work myself and don't have anyone "looking over my shoulder" so to speak. Accounting, like language, has patterns I can identify more quickly and easily than most people. The structure is reassuring, I know what is expected and my creative streak works out solutions to problems others often don't see.

    I've had to learn to organise myself over the years - routine helps. Timetables don't always help, as if you don't get things done on time it can be off putting. I find writing lists helpful - the items can be organised into most important to least important, or if none are that important, they can be ranked by how interesting they are. Sometimes doing more boring things first is better, as it gets them out of the way so you can enjoy the more interesting stuff.

    Women with aspergers are often not recognised as having it. Do a Google search for attributes of female aspies. You'll learn more about yourself as time goes on and you'll learn how to cope. At least you have a clue why you are like you are - I didn't until less than a year ago, and it's been a steep learning curve. Very interesting though.

    All the best

    Pixie

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