3 year old currently being tested... Am I coming or going???

My little boy is currently witing to be tested for autism... Me and my partner are currently pulling our hair out with little support at all! The preschool get notified of someone coming to visit before we do and the school cant tell us from which department this person is coming because they don't actually know!!! My little boy is 3 and cannot communicate at all. He will just echo us and I have no idea of he actually understands us! We keep bringing this up to many professionals but its almost like they don't understand... They dont offer us help or give us suggestions of what might be affecting him.

We have been pushing for this since he was 1 and I'm heartbroken because my little boy cannot communicate with me, he knows colours and numbers and can point to various parts of his body. But yet nothing else which ends up in meltdowns... Does anyone have any similar experiences? I feel 

Hi I'm new to this so I'm just going to rant and pray that someone, anyone understands.

My little boy is called Blake. He was extended breech, born by c-section and only slept on daddy. He couldn't crawl, but took to walking, could do eye contact but hated the hoover. Prefered to play alone and he only ever said one word nouns when he was meant to be talking properly. We knew something wasnt right but got told 'wait and see.' We were then referred to speech and language at two. (He hasnt seen them for 6 months.)

Blake is now 3. He is happy and oh so smart. He can count up to 20, identify numbers, colours and has mastered nouns and echoing like a pro. But... He cant tell us how his day is, what he did at preschool, what he wants for dinner or christmas. I'm not even sure if he knows what christmas, or dinner is... To be honest, I'm not sure if he can understand what I'm telling him. I've brought this up to many professionals and I get brushed off. Have you had that? SENCO and Cams (sorry bit rusty) are coming to test him but when? God only knows.

Blake has major meltdowns where Mummy (me) isnt allowed to touch him. It's daddy. Daddy this... daddy that. All i get is freaking bedtime and I look around my house, or when Daddy and Blake are interacting and I go 'Where do I fit in all of this?' I'm envious of my own partner
... Hell I'm envious of parents I dont even know who get a response from there child even if its snarky. I am such a terrible person. Or is that normal?

Is it normal for someone with suspected autism to not talk or have major delays? Is it normal to feel so damn isolated? Is it normal for me as a parent to be envious of others? To wish for my child just to be communicative just for an hour? To cry because I have no idea where I went wrong or what the future will be like? I know compared to most people I must have it pretty easy. But right now it doesn't feel easy at all.  I have no support and absolutely no-one to answer these stupid questions. But if anyone out there knows if my son can understand me. How to help him with language. If this language barrier is a certain aspect of autism. Or even of you feel like you are like me. A parent who is on the outside looking in, tredding the waters of the unknown. A kind word or two word really go far.

Em x

Parents
  • What your feeling is totally normal.  

    My Sons first six months of his life he cried incessantly unless he was with me or his Dad.

    18months he wasn't talking like his peers.  So we went to speech therapy..  via his health visitor.  

    Can you contact speech & language .Even if he isn't understanding language at the moment.

     He may talk later or learn alternative communication skills in the meantime.  The sooner the better.

    I ended up begging my GP for an assessment.  Eventually around two he got a diagnosis.

    It may be Autisim that has caused his echolia or delayed speech.  Doesn't have to be.  

    One of my relatives had similar problems to your Son,isn't Autistic but was able to catch up with peers after being sent to a special School then mainstream primary School.

    We have Kids & map out their lives it's what parents do.  Its normal to be upset if you see your child struggle when compared to his peers.  

    Isolation & anxs normal.  My Son is 20 now.  Realistically looking back not every stress we experienced was due to his Autism.  

    Can relate to sometimes envying other parents.  But you will have positive times aswell.

    The assessment will also take into consideration what you tell experts about your Son.

    Maybe helpful to write down things he does that you feel are not meeting his developmental stages.  Or are different from his peers.

    kind Regards

    Star

Reply
  • What your feeling is totally normal.  

    My Sons first six months of his life he cried incessantly unless he was with me or his Dad.

    18months he wasn't talking like his peers.  So we went to speech therapy..  via his health visitor.  

    Can you contact speech & language .Even if he isn't understanding language at the moment.

     He may talk later or learn alternative communication skills in the meantime.  The sooner the better.

    I ended up begging my GP for an assessment.  Eventually around two he got a diagnosis.

    It may be Autisim that has caused his echolia or delayed speech.  Doesn't have to be.  

    One of my relatives had similar problems to your Son,isn't Autistic but was able to catch up with peers after being sent to a special School then mainstream primary School.

    We have Kids & map out their lives it's what parents do.  Its normal to be upset if you see your child struggle when compared to his peers.  

    Isolation & anxs normal.  My Son is 20 now.  Realistically looking back not every stress we experienced was due to his Autism.  

    Can relate to sometimes envying other parents.  But you will have positive times aswell.

    The assessment will also take into consideration what you tell experts about your Son.

    Maybe helpful to write down things he does that you feel are not meeting his developmental stages.  Or are different from his peers.

    kind Regards

    Star

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