Assessment Help

Oh, please don't apologise. I'm sorry if I gave you the impression you've done something wrong, far from it. I'm probably not that great at putting things across sometimes. We have difficulty with communication you know... We all appreciate that everyone speaks as they find, but favts are scarce, and often argued over, about our condition and the range of rubbish that people sometimes encounter when they're trying to find out, like you, who they are, often gets some of us going.

You're right to say that 'finding out who you are' is important. After my head stopped spinning following my diagnosis, the first coherent thought I had was 'so that's who I am' and others say the same. You have some hope for the future just in seeking that important information, and bless you, we know what you're going through right now whilst you're waiting to find out.

I'll apologise again if I upset you, I was trying to help you to see through some of the process. We can't diagnose you, sadly, and any advice we give can only come from our personal experiences. I'm fully supportive of getting a diagnosis because It's made such a vast difference to me and I want others to experience the same change to their lives. I still have the same difficulties, but I'm learning to understand them much more.

You carry on writing to the best of your ability. My comments were meant to be helpful, not critical of you personaly, and I'm truly sorry if I made you feel that way.

I wish you nothing but good, and we're always here to (try, in my case ) help, advise and support you

Firstly no offense was meant by my poor choice of words. I could start an argument with myself at times. So I apologies If I have offended anyone. To be honest that is one of my issues in that I manage to alienate people without even trying.

I certainly am currently depressed, with anxiety, depression and even a touch of paranoia, a lovely combination. However, the things I am good at, I am very good at, mathematics and using computers as an example, but dealing with people is another story.

The inconsistency is one of things that I find difficult and probably is for people who know me / work with me.

The not knowing is hard, even though I think I have it as I recognise so many symptoms, however soon perhaps I will know for certain and can restart my life knowing who I am.

Thanks for the comments.

Hiya. I must take issue with you for calling AS a 'developmental disorder', it is nothing of the sort. I resent being called 'disordered' and so do many of us. We have a condition known to be on the autism spectrum, which simply describes our differences to NTs. You were (assuming you do get diagnosed as autistic) born that way. Your development, like anyone else's, was subject to your environment, but you were in that environment as an AS person.

There is absolutely no need whatsoever for either your school reports or any input from your parents. The assessement is of you, the other information helps to inform the process when it is available, but many people have neither of those things to offer. This doesn't affect your asessement, although we do sometimes hear from posters telling us that they have been told it is essential. This is simply not true.

Depression and anxiety go with our condition, mainly due to trying to function in a world that we have no control over, largely populated by people who cannot understand our difference. We have 'troubled minds' because of the way our brains work, but that doesn't mean that we are incapable, incompetent, or untalented. Quite the reverse, but the depression and anxiety that we get because this is not understood simply adds to the pool of negativity that is our experience when out in the NT world.

A 2 hour asessemnt is sufficient, in the hands of a properly qualified assessor, to make the diagnosis. There is nothing that you can be pre-warned about because it is a dynamic process -  it is a tailored discussion, not a question and answer tick-box filling exercise. No two such assessments can ever be the same because no two people are ever the same.

Remember, this is your assessment. Some of us have had very good experiences, some of us have had very bad experiences. You cannot take either example as indicative of how yours will go.

However, let me assure you that the session will not be painful or harmful to you. The (typical) anxiety you are feeling over it is perfectly normal for anyone, the intensity of it is very much AS in nature. Relax into the session - two hours seem long, but my own two hours were over in about 5 minutes, it seemed. I can't remember any of the discussion, apart from a few odd snippets, and I'm still amazed that that was all it took.

I did an AQ questionnaire, it meant little to me at the time and I can't remember any of that either, but on the strength of it I was put straight to the assessemnt, although I had to wait a year for it to come around. I didn't come to this website untill after I'd been diagnosed, and frankly I'm glad. I think that if I'd asked questions and got the range of answers that commonly arise, I'd have been thouroughly confused and even more anxious.

You're an individual, you make your own choices and decisions, and I sincerely hope that you get the answers that you deserve whether you decide to include your parents or not - you know them better than any of us so we cannot advise you either way. Your answers will come from your diagnosis, not from us. All we can do is welcome and support you, understand who you are and what you're going through, and do discussions like this with you. I think that if you spend time going over old threads on here, it will give you a much greater understanding of our range of experience when we are faced with questions such as yours.

I wish you all the best

Thanks for all the comments they are all very helpful. I think I will at least try to get the assessments sent out to my parents, and they could fill them in, the worst they can do it to say no.

You are right about depression and Aspergers, the depression thing was the starting point to the whole diagnosis procedure.

I can fully understand the reasoning of getting my parents involved; after all it is a developmental disorder more than anything else. And they would know how I was a child, more than I can remember anyway. However I wouldn’t want to make them upset, things are not brilliant for them at the moment.

I’ll also contact my former school to see if they have kept any records.

Thanks again for all the comments, and I will let you know what I decide and how the assessment goes.

Hello Abe,  Happy New Year to you and it's great to hear that you are getting a good level of support - sounds like your employer in particular has demonstrated good practice.  

In terms of your assessment, my understanding (from information I read before my own assessment) is that the presence of another informant (usually a parent) is an important part of the process in terms of getting an accurate diagnosis.  This is because the person can report on your early development from the period when you were too young to remember and also so that the assessor can get another perspective on your difficulties/characteristics from someone who knows you really well.  In my case I was also concerned about my parents attending - in fact I almost didn't go through with it because I felt so guilty.  I had previously discussed autism with them and my Dad in particular had got very angry and dismissed the idea.  When I did have an assessment date arranged I was worried he would refuse to attend or not answer the questions truthfully.  I thought my Mum would find it very upsetting and perhaps feel judged as a parent - basically I thought I was going to put them through a horrible experience.  The reality of what happened was completely different though!! - as soon as they knew a clinical psychologist had said I should be assessed and that this would help me, they were totally supportive and came to the assessment.  The type of assessment I had was called DISCO (Diagnostic Interview for Social and Communication Disorders) and this involved my parents being asked a standard set of questions, I then saw the psychologist separately and answered the same questions.  I also asked for the questions in advance but the psychologist said she wouldn't send them because this ensured the answers were spontaneous and more accurate.  There was nothing that I was asked that was uncomfortable / intrusive / difficult - it was basically just talking about what I could remember about my childhood and examples of the various characteristics of autism/aspergers.  My parents are both quite shy and don't like talking about personal things, both told me that they didn't find the assessment at all stressful though.

Of course, you know your parents best and what might be a good way to approach them but what I would suggest is to just set out the facts as you did in your post and perhaps give them some information about Aspergers (if this is not a topic they are familiar with) and ask if one or both of them will attend (they might feel more comfortable if both attend).  Perhaps just keep the conversation short and to the point and give them time to think about it before they give you an answer so the situation is less pressurised.  

Re. your school reports - I have never heard of these being used in an assessment but I doubt they are essential because so many people don't keep that kind of stuff.  Also, thinking back to my own school reports, they were a score out of 6 for each subject and couple of quick comments from the teacher, so I don't think a lot could be gleened from them.  My gut feeling would be not to worry too much about these but if you are concerned, check with the service who have arranged your assessment to see how important they are.  They may just say to bring along what you have.  If you do need to get hold of the others, then I would say to contact your old school in the first instance as I don't think those things would be routinely passed on to the local council.

I hope that this is helpful - very best of luck with everything!