Can't cope with diagnosis

Hello Emily001

Don't be upset about your diagnosis. Coogybear and classic codger are right. Finding out that you have an Autistic Spectrum Condition can be liberating and a positive thing.

You now have the chance to learn about yourself and see why some things in your life just haven't worked out despite your very best efforts. You also get to forgive yourself for things you've thought you have done badly or got wrong - chances are that those things were all due to the ASC and not anything you have done deliberately.

You will go through a period of wondering what you can do now... but armed with your new knowledge about yourself, you'll be able to concentrate on things that you feel comfortable with and not automatically follow other peoples expectations.

Remember you are not a 'label', you are an individual, just as you were before having the condition identified. 
I found my diagnosis was a relief, an explanation for what had seemed a very 'odd' life up until then. It has given me confidence and a willingness to stand up for myself now. 

Take your time, learn about yourself. You find will lots of people here who have been through the same experience. As classic codger says - you are not alone any more.

Hi Emily

Yes, we unnderstand very well because so many of us have been through exactly the same thing

You are allowed to consider yourself very lucky. A great number of AS people either never get a 'proper' diagnosis, or get it late in life - there are a few of us on here with diagnoses very late in our lives, but as Coogy says, it still makes a huge difference.

It is natural for you to feel the way that you do right now, the diagnosis moves just about everything to do with your life into a new perspective. As you learn more about yourself, especially by talking on here with us, you will come to appreciate yourself in new ways.

Personally, I'm becoming a whole new person. I'm finding it a strange journey, but interesting and hugely beneficial. I've even found my community for the first time in my life, and it makes an enormous difference to know that it isn't 'me' or even 'just me', so I no longer feel totally alone and isolated. I'm even beginning to understand why people have always seemed to be willing to be cruel to me, and why I don't have to let that happen again.

You are an AS person, and you are different from most people. You don't need to tell anyone, although later you should find that telling those few people who are important to you will help them to understand you even better. The choice always stays with you.

So, right now you are lost in a sea of confusion and negativity about yourself and your condition, but this will mostly clear away and you will become much more comfortable with yourself. Your new community is here to help and share with you, and we will - that's an Aspie promise! It won't stop the difficulties, but it will stop you feeling bad so bad about them as you learn to deal with them in new ways, and you will definitely learn to be kind to, and about, yourself.

You have every hope for a better future, and, most importantly, you are not alone any more.

Hi Emily and welcome,

   Diagnosis does not totally define who you are. You are more than just Autistic, you are unique.

I do understand, how you feel, as I've gone through similar emotions myself, but as I've come to understand what it means to me as a person, I now relise that I have a lot more to offer than most, as a result.

You've not mentioned your age or whether you have read up about the condition, but I'd be happy to reccommend some reading and/or videos, if you would find it helpful.

The post-diagnosis period can be full of mixed emotions, so try not to obsess over it too much at this point. Time to process such info varies from person to person.

I've found the diagnosis process quite liberating myself, mainly because it's explained so much of my life to me. (I'm a late identified Adult with ASD) Had I have known sooner about my condition, I probably would have done things differently.

Also, you do not have to declare your condition to others if you don't want to.

Take your time and talk it through with loved ones or others you trust, about how you feel. Building on the knowledge you have about you, can be a very positive experience if you take time to embrace it and use that new found knowledge as a firm foundation for your future.

The community here is always willing to help with advice or support.

Coogybear