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DON'T KNOW WHERE TO TURN AND SCARED !!

vickimacca

Hi , over the past 2 years we have been through a very hard time with Social Services . Since both my children were very young we have had issues behavioural , educational , self harm, foodCry and social. The children were being assessed for A.S.D when Social Services got involved falsely accusing us of Fabricated Induced Illness and as I have Depression also accusing me of having Munchausen's Syndrome . We are now fully finished with Social Services as the social worker was found to be incompetent and our doctor , who was the Safeguarding Officer , wrote a letter stating that we hadn't made anything up .

The assessment concluded with both children having A.S.D. traits but not enough for a diagnosis. The issues with the children are getting worse and they are struggling with life ( our son mainly but sometimes our daughter ) and the problem is we don't know where to turn ,I trust our doctor but after all that has happened my husband and I are scared as we don't want Social Services involved again . What can we do , where can we go I only want a diagnosis so that we can get the help and support that our childen need . Our family is broken and we don't know how to fix it , I can't even talk to the school because of the same reason .
Please can someone give us some advice , I was going to phone the Autism Helpline but i'm scared of doing that too.i just wish that someone would believe us and help

Parents

  • Hello vickimacca,

      Can I suggest watching this video, It may help you understand why your son or daughter reaches flair-up so easily. Sarah makes a few suggestions about strategies to help with preventing children getting to the stage of meltdown and agression and this may also be helpful.

    www.youtube.com/watch

    Longmans suggestion of advocacy and Access to an Autism Hub is a great idea. The people there should be best placed to support you with your specific difficulties. And you shouldn't fear contacting the NAS or a local Autism hub. They will only report to authorities, if a child is being put at risk in some way.

    Additionally, meeting other parents; and indeed children, who have ASD will also help you realize that you are not alone.

    See if their are any ASD strategy classess in your area. Far from being simple parenting classes, these will help you identify some well practiced patterns that maybe triggering meltdowns, whilst using different methods to defuse flair-ups or avoid them all together. They should be ASD focused and therefore more tailored to your needs.

    Going back to your original point. I agree, ASD traits is not a helpful statement, as it indicates areas of need, but with no provision to help you. Could you tell me who gave this assessment? If it is someone who isn't best placed to make a full diagnosis it means very little and you may wish to go back and ask your GP to refer you to an 'ASD specialist' who can assess your children more thoroughly. The reason I ask is that the word 'Traits' can be given as a 'cop-out' if services are in short supply or money is tight in the trust in your region.

    Please keep in mind, that assessment is as much about ruling things out, as it is ruling things in. If, given your current situation, you feel you can source support and strategies yourself, then do so. Please remember however, that even with a diagnosis, support has very often got to be parent/child led.

    If you have futher questions, please ask here any time and do contact the NAS helpline. You will be on hold for a while, but they can send you a world of info in the post or via e-mail.

    Take Care

    Coogybear

Reply

  • Hello vickimacca,

      Can I suggest watching this video, It may help you understand why your son or daughter reaches flair-up so easily. Sarah makes a few suggestions about strategies to help with preventing children getting to the stage of meltdown and agression and this may also be helpful.

    www.youtube.com/watch

    Longmans suggestion of advocacy and Access to an Autism Hub is a great idea. The people there should be best placed to support you with your specific difficulties. And you shouldn't fear contacting the NAS or a local Autism hub. They will only report to authorities, if a child is being put at risk in some way.

    Additionally, meeting other parents; and indeed children, who have ASD will also help you realize that you are not alone.

    See if their are any ASD strategy classess in your area. Far from being simple parenting classes, these will help you identify some well practiced patterns that maybe triggering meltdowns, whilst using different methods to defuse flair-ups or avoid them all together. They should be ASD focused and therefore more tailored to your needs.

    Going back to your original point. I agree, ASD traits is not a helpful statement, as it indicates areas of need, but with no provision to help you. Could you tell me who gave this assessment? If it is someone who isn't best placed to make a full diagnosis it means very little and you may wish to go back and ask your GP to refer you to an 'ASD specialist' who can assess your children more thoroughly. The reason I ask is that the word 'Traits' can be given as a 'cop-out' if services are in short supply or money is tight in the trust in your region.

    Please keep in mind, that assessment is as much about ruling things out, as it is ruling things in. If, given your current situation, you feel you can source support and strategies yourself, then do so. Please remember however, that even with a diagnosis, support has very often got to be parent/child led.

    If you have futher questions, please ask here any time and do contact the NAS helpline. You will be on hold for a while, but they can send you a world of info in the post or via e-mail.

    Take Care

    Coogybear

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