Hello I am new to the forum and thought I would see if anyone could give me some advice or their opinion. My son is 5 next month as been in primary school reception since September. He was diagnosed with a significant developmental and learning delay when he was 2 and a half and still has it to this day. He has been assessed many times by the same community paedetrician since he was 3 and has dealt with a few other experts such as the educational psychologist, SALT etc. He has speech therapy for almost a year which came to a halt when he began school even though his speech isn't significantly delayed anymore just a very mild delay he is being re referred back to his speech therapist as he is badly struggling with his blending of phonics etc.
Long story cut short...we have been in limbo these last 2 years as to if it is the autistic spectrum or not he is on...or of he has any other learning disability such as dyspraxia, dyslexic etc.
His paeditrician each time has said its a learning delay BUT I am not ruling out autism and any other learning disabilities in the future as he is showing many traits of a child on the spectrum but then he is showing signs that a child wouldn't display if they did have autism.
He has a mild speech delay which is slowly catching up, he loves socialising which is what is confusing about this all as people keep saying to us an autistic child tends to like their own company or that of an adult and struggles to socialise with children, our son is the opposite he can make friends with any one and any adult he is actually over friendly and can be a bit too exciteable which can cause other children and adults to back away from him a bit as he can be a bit too much at times. He is very affectionate and loves everyones company. He is not hyperactive to be considering add or ADHD. He iis better at his logic and maths than literacy which he is very delayed in.
his class teacher and doctor have said his behaviour and emotions is that of a 3 year olds even thiugh he is slowly growing out of it but is always delayed and different to that of any child around him.
He is starting to become more sensitive to specific noises which we are confused about. He cannot stand the noise of the shower on his ears he will hold his ears and scream it's hurting his ears it's too loud (when it's not) and have a meltdown and cry till we turn the shower off. He hates the sounds of policecar etc. Sirens and holds his ears, he can't stand the sound of the clock tower bell, or loud music and when a group of adults laugh he says it's too loud and tells them to stop.
He was sensitive to the sound of jingles and nursery rhymes as a toddler and has only just staggered getting use to it.
His is understanding is delayed which can be the main concern for us as parents as he just cannot grasp a lot of things no matter how you explain it it takes ALOT of explaining in many different ways to tell him what is happening or why etc. Or what to do...and sometimes he just will never understand even though it can be the most basic of things that any other child of his age would understand.
He he is unaware of other people's personal space sometimes...getting a bit to close to friends and aduLts etc. When standing or sitting down and he doesn't understand when we tell him that's too close but he's fine with there being in his personal space.
He doesn't avoid eye contact anymore he is always asking to play with all the children and is usually the one who is never alone at playtime as he relys on comstand play with others.
His behaviour was that of an autistics child growing up. He is still extremlet fidgety I know children can be but he cannot sit still unless he is ill...always swinging his legs or moving and twitching of some sort. He loves his routine and if it is a different day or evening he struggles to adapt to it and will have tantrums and a rough day but will get on with it grumpily.
He is the worst fussy eater since he was a toddler. He goes on food based by there look rather than their taste we physically can't get him to try any new foods even with bribery as he doesn't like the way it looks even if it's on a nice plate or decorated fun and nicley and he eats such a small amount of different types of foods and it is getting worse than better the older he gets!
He doesn't really understand jokes or sarcasm in anyway everything is taken literally with him where a joke can actually upset him and make him have a huge tantrum and outburst. He is starting to hit is when he had a tantrum too but not viciously.
He gets picked on an fair bit already by older children and one or two kids in his class as he is different and my son doesn't understand that they're being mean and will let them take advantage of his kind loving nature and say mean words to him and push him about and he will never go and tell a teacher or another child no matter how any of us and his teacher have explained it to him he doesn't understand the situation.
Im so confused with the paediatrician saying she's not ruling this out but for now would say no...that isn't fair in my eyes as we as parents want him to recieve the best help possible he needs to progress well in his school life! He has a statement funded by the government for a year in preschool and then they rejected the new statement for his reception year in school as his speech was progressing which is absolutlet ridiculous as he does need someone there to guide him through learning and play most of the time. His nursery teachers were appalled that the government wouldn't give him his one on one teacher again for school as he learns much better in a. Very small group and one on one that in a huge class of 32 children!
He was out on school action plus instead through SENCO and is actually classed as having special educational needs! he doesn't get barely any one on one time with the assistant teacher in the class as she has to work her way around the class which is why I feel he is behind.
His class teacher has said to me he certainly shows traits of a child with very mild autism and she has known her pupils on the past to not be diagnosed with their learning disabilities till they're were 7-10 years old!!
He was born via ventouse and then forceps and they avoided a csection at all costs because they are stingy and instead alms ot crushed his skull pulling him out that he had a deep lasseration and a large capput on his head. They rushed him off for a cat scan as they thought he had a brain hemmorage but he didn't in the end but to this day at 5 he still has the dent in his skull where he had the deep cut and crush from the forceps and I know they say autism is usually genetic but I believe this played a part in his difficulties in life now.
If anyone can give me their opinion on what they believe I should do or what is wrong I would be very greatful as I'm so confused :(he is seeing the paediatrician again in spring this year but we are currently waiting for an assessment with CAMHS which the gp referred him to fr a second opinion as he believes it needs to be looked into again.
thank u
