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Help with Sons aggression

littlewren

Hi,

My son is on the painfully slow road to diagnosis not helped by the school refusing to assess him. His next appointment isn't with the paediatrician until at least October (last appt oct last year)because the wait for the NHS ed psych is so long.

I am really concerned about his behaviour. He is extremely aggressive in nature and is violent towards his family and animals. He has had the odd outburst at school but they think he is an angel lol what's troubling now aside from the hitting is the threats. Yesterday he had a plastic knife in his hand and threatened to stab his dad. If he kicks off I have to move dangerous objects and he is constantly threatening to cut, stab and kill us. 

I don't know if this is a normal child acting out or a child on the spectrum. Our peadiatrician gave us lots of info on autism and told us to look at social stories etc but I'm worried they will turn around and say he is fine. We have no support outside of friends and family, its a very lonely existence when you don't know which way to turn.

Any advice on what I should do next would be very much appreciated.

  • Speaking from an English perspective ...  Have you applied to the local authority for an Education and Healthcare Plan (EHCP) ? The local authority is required to either carry out and complete the assessment within twenty weeks or give you a reason why they will not carry out an assessment. A refusal can be appealed to SENDIST. Many authorities fail to meet the deadline and you may need to threaten legal action.

    An EHCP will involve an educational psychologist, social worker and other professionals. The school must also send a report. You can submit reports from your child's paediatrician. Even if you do not get a formal diagnosis of ASC, you should get a plan that details what his needs are and how they can be met.  The Ed Psych is usually employed by the education authority, not the NHS.

    Make sure your son's  GP is aware your son is using weapons and making threats. Send a letter (signed for) or email asking for an urgent referral to Child and Adolescent Mental Health Services. Using a weapon and injuring animals can be indicative of Conduct Disorder, not just autism - it is probably worth getting a proper psychiatric assessment for him as soon as possible, before things get out hand as he gets bigger and stronger.

  • This i think is completely normal,my son is like this,its awful,so my heart goes out to you,we have meltdowns with violence almost everyday.

    We see the peadatrician every 4 months she is very good,you could ask to be seen more often.

    Its a well known fact that autistic children can be good at school and bad at home or other way round,we have it that my son is good at school and bad at home,however we were lucky as nbursery picked up on his problems at a young age and he was given support from there.

    If i were you,i would write a diary of absolutely everything he does,even things that you think are normal,because we live it everyday it becomes normal to us,give a copy to school ad to your childs peadatrician,when you give your copy to school speak to the senco about it,explai how difficult it is and hopefully they will get the ed pychn i who will pick up on things.

    I amnn hoping that when we next go to see the pead my son will hopefully get the diagnose he needs, especially after the salt report.

    Talk to anyone who will listen,it helps to talk a little,we have no support,no break,no nothing however i i go on sites and cry y heart out as i type.

    Theres alwaybsb someone here to listen when you vent xx

  • Thank you I have read the thread and I can definitely relate. I will take him along to the doctors. He's a little younger he is 5yrs, but even at that ages they must be able to grasp what is right and wrong.

  • Former Member
    Former Member

    Hi

    Your post reminded me of a similar thread a few weeks ago.

    community.autism.org.uk/.../fed-0

    I don't know how you deal with this situation apart from the suggestions on that thread. I would talk to your GP about it though. They may be able to advise or refer you for some urgent intervention.