What is even the point of diagnosis??!!!

My son is 15, coming up 16, and was diagnosed with ASD and ADHD in October. 

i've always known he's on the autistic spectrum but he's slipped through the net quite spectacularly, and I feel totally let down by the school and the system.  Anyways- apart from the school panicking he's going to fail his GCSEs (probably purely because of his league tables!) and throwing extra maths etc at him, very little has changed. I don't feel there is any support or understanding or anyone to turn to with regard to him leaving school and becoming 'independent' which he really isn't. 

I actually feel I've been punished for coping too well, and I'm pretty terrified about him going to college and getting there in one piece. And now I have to prove he needs help!!! Is the diagnosis itself not enough proof that he MAY actually need support???? how do I PROVE that my son won't go anywhere without his mum??!! Has no friends?! Is adamant he isn't going to college??!! And what's worse is his brother is 15 months younger and Mr Sociable, never home, really confident, and like a huge spotlight pointing at his brothers difficulties. I feel more alone than when I knew I was right pre diagnosis :( 

Parents
  • Hi Pink Pixie,

     I've just put together some advice for a fellow forum follower which you may also find useful, re: statements.

    community.autism.org.uk/.../help-please-newly-diagnosed-behavioural-issues

    I hope you don't mind but I've suggested you read each others threads as it seems you have a few issues in common. As Socks says, I have been through the mill re: support for my boys.

    Although my Ed Psych acknowledges my case was somewhat unique, it did also highlights what can happen when a parent is not naturally assertive and the lengths I had to go to to get the correct support for my sons.

    Tribununal wrote a damming report about my LA and the Schools poor SEN policy. My Ed Psych said in 40 years of work in his field he'd never seen such a poor miscarrage of justice concerning a childs needs. We were advised to sue, but frankly I couldn't face it. All we wanted was what was right for the child!

    Sadly, you will have to be firm. Like you, I was also very angry, but I chaneled that into getting the right support for my boys.

    Take Care

    Coogybear

Reply
  • Hi Pink Pixie,

     I've just put together some advice for a fellow forum follower which you may also find useful, re: statements.

    community.autism.org.uk/.../help-please-newly-diagnosed-behavioural-issues

    I hope you don't mind but I've suggested you read each others threads as it seems you have a few issues in common. As Socks says, I have been through the mill re: support for my boys.

    Although my Ed Psych acknowledges my case was somewhat unique, it did also highlights what can happen when a parent is not naturally assertive and the lengths I had to go to to get the correct support for my sons.

    Tribununal wrote a damming report about my LA and the Schools poor SEN policy. My Ed Psych said in 40 years of work in his field he'd never seen such a poor miscarrage of justice concerning a childs needs. We were advised to sue, but frankly I couldn't face it. All we wanted was what was right for the child!

    Sadly, you will have to be firm. Like you, I was also very angry, but I chaneled that into getting the right support for my boys.

    Take Care

    Coogybear

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