• Replies 6 replies
  • Subscribers 25 subscribers
  • Views 2082 views
  • Users 0 members are here
Options
Related
Hints and tips
  • To quote someone's message, first select/highlight the relevant text, and then use the Quote button that appears
  • To "mention" someone, type @ followed by the start of the forum name, and choose from the list; that person will get a notification of being mentioned

After diagnosis?

Murfster

Hi,

I'm an newly diagnosed 40 year old adult and wondered what feelings and emotions other people felt after being diagnosed?

For me it's caused some serious reflection over my life and all the total car crash relationships and experiences that have been down to my behaviour. Now I know why.

Still very....I dont know...to digest.

  • Former Member
    Former Member

    Who says you have learning difficulties? ASD can make people appear to have learning difficulties when actually, inside your head, you have thoughts that are as busy, rich and as detailed  as anyone else.

    Interviews are tough for people with ASD. I have had loads over the years and it was always a mystery to me as to why I would get through some and have a complete train crash in another. Now that I know that I have ASD, I am able to try and make some allowances and learn to take turns in the conversation and look people in the eye. It is hard, it doesn't come naturally and it feels a bit weird sometimes but you can tip the balance in your favour at least a bit.

    It sounds as though you could really benefit from the services offered by an adult autism support service. Has anyone talked about this to you?

  • Its better than that! There is nothing about you that needs fixing. A diagnosis is based on a list of things that you cannot do or do poorly. Thats bound to make anyone feel broken. But being autistic is so much more than their wretched 'triad of impairments'.

    We have many wonderful qualities and abilities and we can define ourselves to include all of them. As recombinantsocks says look for the opportunities in each day and make your life fit you and enrich you. And a big welcome to being autistic!

  • Former Member
    Former Member

    I cannot fix myself

    No, you cannot become non-autistic. You can however be comfortable with yourself. You can learn to understand yourself and have less conflict in your life. You can make every day a challenge and an opportunity rather than an obstacle course.

  • I've been doing a lot of reflection since getting the diagnosis and it's made me realise that I've had so many missed opportunities and chances in the past in terms of relationships but I screwed them all up either because I didnt know what to do/say or was too anxious.

    I've also hurt quite a few people along the way as I've not really understood what effect my words and actions would have.

    My life has been a bit of a disaster in some respects so I'm glad that I know now what has been causing all the problems. But I dont know whether to feel OK or sad about the past and the future.

  • Hello, I'm newly diagnosed at 41 years old.  It's brought up all sorts of emotions for me.  Initially I was mourning a life that could have been had I had help when I was young, then anger at my parents for not doing anything, now I am sort of relieved to have an explanation to the car crash that is my life.  the knowlege and self awareness I have developed is also helping me to try and resolve some if the issues.  It is a slow process and I am having good and bad days processing the diagnosis.  I am finding it very tough overall to deal with this knowledge but am hoping the diagnosis will ultimately be positive but it has caused a lot of introspective reflection for me.  How about you?