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Abuse from NHS nurses.

Miss.Omnivore99

I would like to ask others if they, too, have been abused verbally, mentally etc by nurses that work in General hospitals prior to being diagnosed with autism?

I've suffered horribly in both my local hospitals - Poole General and Royal Bournemouth - and now flatly refuse to go anywhere near any hospital, anywhere in Britain. 
I have been verbally abused and had the p!ss taken out of me by nurses and due to being physically disabled, have had to crawl on my hands and knees out of A&E whilst nurses have walked alongside me laughing. 

I’ve been ‘different’ all my life and have only recently been diagnosed with autism. Suddenly everything makes sense. It’s heartbreaking that I’ve had to wait my whole life for somebody to realise that all the ‘reports’ about me were wrong. I’m not mad and I’m not bad but after decades of mental health diagnoses - EUPD amongst others - I was told my troubles were “behavioural” and MH washed their hands of me. Everybody then assumed my meltdowns were delinquent behaviour and I ended up in prison. 
It was my saving grace. 

whilst in prison they had eyes on me 24/7 and realised that I had been wrongly convicted and wrongly labelled. After many assessments I was diagnosed with autism with Complex Post traumatic stress disorder. 

I left prison just under 2 years ago and have the support that I’d been denied all my life. 
People now know that I’m not a horrible person, I’m not violent or aggressive and I’m not attention seeking. 
Im 60 years old in a couple of months time and my life has finally started to be one that I would like to keep. I’ve been on life support twice when things have gotten really unbearable and now that I’ve left prison I have a great team of people supporting me. 

The one thing that causes me any upset now is wondering how many other women are out there going through the horrors that I have?

I hope they find somebody that sees them for who they truly are and not treated harshly because MH services and the NHS are still living in the dark ages and reject anyone that doesn’t fit the mould that they’re trying to squeeze them into. 

Parents

  • Sad and also a little angry that you've had that long to wait to be properly diagnosed and supported.

    Glad and happy that you are OK with life now  

    I've found, like yourself, that I can understand myself better thro' the lens of autism since being diagnosed 4 years ago aged 58  The sort of "behavioural" "meltdowns" that I have experienced, that maybe similar to what you maybe describe, are easier to understand and maybe even resolve.

    My experience is that people behave the way they do for a reason - I like other autistic people don't have the "automatic working out" of what to say or do in social context perhaps and so trying to work out that reason why is the way my mind works...

    Some people - maybe those staff that you mentioned - automatically "short-cut" the working out and so the "behavioural" tag gets put on - as if it's something that someone really should be able to simply do or not do.  For whatever reason people in that hospital situation are meant to be trained to spot what is going on and consider the biology, the psychology and the social situation.  So even if they're not "angels" they should be able to stop themselves from demonising other people.

    I read your decision not to go near hospitals and acknowledge your right to choose.

    I don't like hospitals and yes there can be some potentially nasty people there as well as everywhere else in my experience,

    That said if it was me I wonder if in future if I might need medical services and to not go could be something that would either make a new found pleasure in life more difficult?  (funnily enough that is my circumstances)

    So I'd think maybe it might be worth looking at some plans for how to manage such things in future?  You mention that you are now getting support.  Personally (despite or maybe because of me having 25 years working in health care in the past) I now make a point of having a trusted person with me at important GP and medical appointments and if i was going to stay in hospital in the future I would really make a point of having clearly let the hospital know, both in advance and when there, that I am autistic and when times are hard I can find it really tough to "keep things together" in the way that neurotypical society might otherwise expect me to do.  My "mask tends to slip" accidentally (rather than me deliberately unmasking) under such circumstances and I can find myself being "more autistic" (I know that maybe seems a daft thing to say but maybe you get what I mean.)

    Maybe with further support you and I and people like us are in position now to help "educate" those mental health and NHS services.

    Anyway whether you're like me and do something to be prepared and defended in a potentially nasty situation, stay away from them in future or maybe find some "hybrid" way that is just right for you - I'm glad that you're in a better place now and also I really respect and admire you for being so open and sharing your life experiences with me.

    My best wishes

Reply

  • Sad and also a little angry that you've had that long to wait to be properly diagnosed and supported.

    Glad and happy that you are OK with life now  

    I've found, like yourself, that I can understand myself better thro' the lens of autism since being diagnosed 4 years ago aged 58  The sort of "behavioural" "meltdowns" that I have experienced, that maybe similar to what you maybe describe, are easier to understand and maybe even resolve.

    My experience is that people behave the way they do for a reason - I like other autistic people don't have the "automatic working out" of what to say or do in social context perhaps and so trying to work out that reason why is the way my mind works...

    Some people - maybe those staff that you mentioned - automatically "short-cut" the working out and so the "behavioural" tag gets put on - as if it's something that someone really should be able to simply do or not do.  For whatever reason people in that hospital situation are meant to be trained to spot what is going on and consider the biology, the psychology and the social situation.  So even if they're not "angels" they should be able to stop themselves from demonising other people.

    I read your decision not to go near hospitals and acknowledge your right to choose.

    I don't like hospitals and yes there can be some potentially nasty people there as well as everywhere else in my experience,

    That said if it was me I wonder if in future if I might need medical services and to not go could be something that would either make a new found pleasure in life more difficult?  (funnily enough that is my circumstances)

    So I'd think maybe it might be worth looking at some plans for how to manage such things in future?  You mention that you are now getting support.  Personally (despite or maybe because of me having 25 years working in health care in the past) I now make a point of having a trusted person with me at important GP and medical appointments and if i was going to stay in hospital in the future I would really make a point of having clearly let the hospital know, both in advance and when there, that I am autistic and when times are hard I can find it really tough to "keep things together" in the way that neurotypical society might otherwise expect me to do.  My "mask tends to slip" accidentally (rather than me deliberately unmasking) under such circumstances and I can find myself being "more autistic" (I know that maybe seems a daft thing to say but maybe you get what I mean.)

    Maybe with further support you and I and people like us are in position now to help "educate" those mental health and NHS services.

    Anyway whether you're like me and do something to be prepared and defended in a potentially nasty situation, stay away from them in future or maybe find some "hybrid" way that is just right for you - I'm glad that you're in a better place now and also I really respect and admire you for being so open and sharing your life experiences with me.

    My best wishes

Children
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