visiting GP for a referral for assessment

The problem with Aspergers, especially in girls, is that it truly is an invisble disability.

I got very good at faking being normal at school until one day I just snapped and my carefully constructed 'mask' fell apart to the point where I couldn't put it back together again. It really shocked/scared my teachers as I'd always been a good 'teachers pet' and they'd never noticed anything 'wrong'. So to suddenly see me completely in pieces really shook them up.

Of course the teachers I had little contact with didn't really understand, but they didn't need to. I had the help I needed, I had a reason to ask for a little help without feeling weak/unjustified, and my confidence grew. I started wearing my mask less and less, and my teachers were shocked to find I had a personality beyond 'quiet, knows the answers'.

Try reaching out to your daughters main teachers, as they're the ones she'll interact with. The Headteacher can be an idiot but ultimately in day to day life they'll have little interaction with your daughter so its not worth worrying over. If you can get your daughters main teacher/s to understand, then that's all that matters. Once I was able to bond with the teachers I saw daily, I started to do a lot better overall, as I felt safe enough to tell them what I was honestly feeling. The head of SEN at high school did a terrible job, but I never had to actually interact with her and all the TA's were wonderful.

Often, teachers will happily adapt to help students, especially if they're behaved in lesson. After discovering I learned best by drawing/doodling alongside notes in lesson, my english teacher would let me draw in the margins of all the mock exams, then give me a blank sheet of paper to take into the genuine exam so I wouldn't give in to anxiety and overdo the answers. Because of this small adjustment, I was able to actually enjoy the subject, not just tolerate it for good marks (as I used to believe that if I didn't get good marks, my future would be over).

My mum is brilliant and has gone on the warpath for me many times over the years, even moreso since my diagnosis, and what she's taught me is to try and pick and choose my fights. If you can't convince the Headteacher, focus on the teachers. Or vice versa. If the GP's don't take you seriously, then you have the right to ask if they have the qualifications to assess your daughter. If they don't have a degree in mental health, it is your -right- to demand for an assessment. Now, when you do get referred, it can take months to get seen, then months to get an official assessment. Its a long process, but again, it's worth it. Just keep doing what you're doing :)

The problem with Aspergers, especially in girls, is that it truly is an invisble disability.

I got very good at faking being normal at school until one day I just snapped and my carefully constructed 'mask' fell apart to the point where I couldn't put it back together again. It really shocked/scared my teachers as I'd always been a good 'teachers pet' and they'd never noticed anything 'wrong'. So to suddenly see me completely in pieces really shook them up.

Of course the teachers I had little contact with didn't really understand, but they didn't need to. I had the help I needed, I had a reason to ask for a little help without feeling weak/unjustified, and my confidence grew. I started wearing my mask less and less, and my teachers were shocked to find I had a personality beyond 'quiet, knows the answers'.

Try reaching out to your daughters main teachers, as they're the ones she'll interact with. The Headteacher can be an idiot but ultimately in day to day life they'll have little interaction with your daughter so its not worth worrying over. If you can get your daughters main teacher/s to understand, then that's all that matters. Once I was able to bond with the teachers I saw daily, I started to do a lot better overall, as I felt safe enough to tell them what I was honestly feeling. The head of SEN at high school did a terrible job, but I never had to actually interact with her and all the TA's were wonderful.

Often, teachers will happily adapt to help students, especially if they're behaved in lesson. After discovering I learned best by drawing/doodling alongside notes in lesson, my english teacher would let me draw in the margins of all the mock exams, then give me a blank sheet of paper to take into the genuine exam so I wouldn't give in to anxiety and overdo the answers. Because of this small adjustment, I was able to actually enjoy the subject, not just tolerate it for good marks (as I used to believe that if I didn't get good marks, my future would be over).

My mum is brilliant and has gone on the warpath for me many times over the years, even moreso since my diagnosis, and what she's taught me is to try and pick and choose my fights. If you can't convince the Headteacher, focus on the teachers. Or vice versa. If the GP's don't take you seriously, then you have the right to ask if they have the qualifications to assess your daughter. If they don't have a degree in mental health, it is your -right- to demand for an assessment. Now, when you do get referred, it can take months to get seen, then months to get an official assessment. Its a long process, but again, it's worth it. Just keep doing what you're doing :)