Hey folks. It's been a little while since I've posted something here. I don't really use these forums that much. But I wanted to share where my life is.
I am trying to be more positive about life in general. It can be difficult with all the bad news and bad stuff going on in the world.
For the first time in a while I feel like my life is actually going somewhere. I took me a while to get a graduate job, but I did it. I started a graduate scheme September last year and it's been great so far. There's a little under a year left, and I hope I can get another job in my organisation. I'll do my very best, practice, prepare and apply for roles.
I mentioned on some other conversations that I was taking driving lessons. I had my practical driving test the other day and I passed. I got 10 minor faults and I'm going to book more lessons so I can get better at driving in general, but particularly junctions, roundabouts, and I'd like to learn how to reverse corner as well. Maybe I can get some motorway training as well. I am undecided on whether or not I would like to purchase a car. Where I live I can get away with not needing one. I'm lucky. I've wanted to learn to drive for a while. I started lessons January last yaer. I've had 88 lessons, 2 hours each. I've written a lot of notes, bought most of the DVSA Driving books. I'm glad I can drive. My instructor is very supportive and encouraging, as are my parents, family, friends and colleagues. I don't feel so behind in life anymore. Life isn't always easy, but I'd rather get up out of bed everyday and try to do something. Even if I fail, maybe I can learn something. But if I don't try, I won't learn anything. I went uni 2019-2023 and it wasn't always great. Wasn't the best years of my life. The last one and a half years have been pretty great. I got an actual job, made progress, made friends, learned a lot. I'm glad I didn't give up. I promise you all: I will never give up! I encourage all of you: never give up. Keep your head up. Keep trying. Life is worth it. My life hasn't exactly gone the way I wanted it to, and some things have happened that have made me cynical and pessimistic. I don't want to harden my heart, but sometimes I'm afraid it's already happened.
I really struggle to be proud of myself for anything, but there is one thing I am proud of: not giving up. I've gotta keep going. I've gotta stop talking down to myself. I've gotta tell myself, I'm not behind in life, I'm not a loser, I'm not a failure, I'm not behind in life. I'm right where I need to be. What I do matters. I can make a positive change. I can make friends. I can make people laugh. I can make eye contact (albeit with some difficulty) when talking to people.
I've gotta believe in myself. I'm trying to be more positive. Generally speaking, compared to 2 - 5 years ago, I do feel better about myself.
I'm glad I found this community. I'm glad I'm alive.
Thank you 
