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Looking for Advice: Supporting my 13-year-old with suspected autism, OCD & emetophobia

LCourtney82

Hi everyone,

I’m reaching out to see if anyone has been through something similar or has advice to share.

My daughter is 13 and currently being assessed for autism. Over the past year, she’s started showing signs of OCD - mainly around cleanliness and food, but it is gradually getting worse. She also has a strong fear of sickness (emetophobia), which is really affecting her day-to-day life. For example, she’s now unable to stay at her dad’s house over night because of anxiety around someone being ill, and she’s becoming increasingly socially anxious.

We’re trying to support her as best we can, but I’d love to hear from other parents who’ve dealt with similar challenges. Specifically:

  • Has anyone navigated OCD alongside autism in their child? How did you tell the difference between autistic routines and OCD compulsions?
  • Have you found any therapies or approaches that helped with emetophobia without the long waiting lists?
  • How do you support your child when their fears start interfering with family routines or relationships?
  • What helped with social anxiety, especially in early teens?
  • Are there any resources, books, or support groups you’d recommend (UK-based)?

We’re speaking to our GP and have a CAMHS referral, but I’d really appreciate hearing from others who’ve been in this position. Even small tips or words of encouragement would mean a lot.

Thanks so much in advance Yellow heart

  • Hi and welcome to the community.

    I'm not a parent of a teen going through this but I am a woman with autistic and OCD traits. My OCD is also about cleanliness, and hand washing in particular. 

    All autistic people have a need for routine and structure, but not all autistic people have OCD. The need for routine is about needing to know when something is going to happen, but an OCD compulsion is about suddenly needing to perform an action to make oneself feel more comfortable, such as washing hands after touching something that one feels is dirty or might harbour germs, or obsessive cleaning of the home, or washing clothes.

    You are doing the right thing by speaking to your GP and getting the CAMHS referral, so try not to worry. They should be able to provide some therapy to help your daughter.

    Sorry I can't be of more help, but wishing you all the best.

  • Dear LCourtney82,

    I am sorry to hear that your daughter is going through such a difficult time. I hope the online community is a helpful resource for you.

    It may be helpful to take a look at some of the NAS advice and guidance pages on Mental health and wellbeing 

    We also have a Autism Services Directory this can be used to look up available support in your local area. 

    If your daughter feels like she wants to she can also talk to Childline | Free counselling service for kids and young people | Childline they have both a phone and online chat service with counsellors who our trained to speak to children about their feelings and worries.

    If you need further support you can speak to your GP about your concerns, especially if things have changed or escalated. 

    Best wishes,

    Olivia Mod