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Why does none of this make sense?

ladynicotine

I've existed with depression for 17 years, medication works intermittantly, but am slowly & steadily getting worse.  There is a family history of depression, so I suspect I've got a dodgy gene somewhere.

 

Two months ago I was diagnosed as having ASD.  I've suspected this was the case for a number of years, but I seem to be finding people more & more difficult to relate to - probably as a result of the worsening depression.  I thought that getting an ASD diagnosis would mean I might be able to get some help with the "social communication" difficulties I'm having, & this might help lift the depression.  I know I will never be free of either.  However, all I seem to have got is "yes, you've got ASD, off you go & have a nice life".

 

I know I'm very lucky.  I'm still managing to work (I have to, to pay the mortgage), & I have no major issues communicating with people.  However all I can find is information along the lines of "you can deal with these issues in these ways" - but I don't really know what my issues are in any detail.  Apparently I'm supposed to feel relieved as a result of my diagnosis as now I "know I'm not alone".  This makes no sense to me - how does knowing others are suffering make me feel better?  I've tried asking the psychologist who diagnosed me & she couldn't/wouldn't explain.

The only person who seems to have benefited from the diagnosis is my psychiatrist - as I suspect that all the problems I've had with medication/therapy over the years will now be put down to "you're misinterpretting it because you have ASD".

What am I doing wrong?

Parents

  • Hi Lady Nicotine

    I confess to feeling the same way about the lack of support. Being diagnosed sets up an expectation of getting help, a progression. 'Oh good' you think 'this is a way forward'. Though autism isn't an illness you would not be told you were diabetic and left to get on with it, so our expectation of help is a reasonable one.

    I feel the truth is that they offer no help because they have none to give. So-called professionals understand autism poorly. They cannot understand how it is to think differently, see the world differently and want to communicate differently. By our age we have have had decades of making coping strategies, copying others and learning what to say and when. I've yet to meet an autism professional who has the skill to guide older autistic women towards a happier future.

    Can I ask what sort of help you were hoping for? If you could have a professional do something to help you or make you feel better what would it be?

Reply

  • Hi Lady Nicotine

    I confess to feeling the same way about the lack of support. Being diagnosed sets up an expectation of getting help, a progression. 'Oh good' you think 'this is a way forward'. Though autism isn't an illness you would not be told you were diabetic and left to get on with it, so our expectation of help is a reasonable one.

    I feel the truth is that they offer no help because they have none to give. So-called professionals understand autism poorly. They cannot understand how it is to think differently, see the world differently and want to communicate differently. By our age we have have had decades of making coping strategies, copying others and learning what to say and when. I've yet to meet an autism professional who has the skill to guide older autistic women towards a happier future.

    Can I ask what sort of help you were hoping for? If you could have a professional do something to help you or make you feel better what would it be?

Children
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