Published on 12, July, 2020
Hi everyone!
I haven't written on a forum before so hoepfully I am doing this right We have a lovely 10 year old boy who has always been very bright, has sepcific interests, e.g trains, minecraft (at the moment is cars, can't go anywhere with out him pointing out makes and models to me!) he has also always struggled to maintain friendships, he doesnt really get invited to parties and things and reccently has been having trouble being teased at school and says to me he feels like theres "something wrong with his personailty" (which breaks my heart) and school have expressed concerns about him fitting in. This has led to me writing on here really because for the last 6 months or so his meltdowns or tantrums at home have got much more frequent, possibly due to being upset over teasing at school or hormones possibly, but they are wearing us out he will scream and throw things, sometimes over unpredictable things i.e the other day his uncle made a joke that he thought he was being serious and teasing him and he just saw red and took over an hour to calm down. Generally at school he doesnt have these tantrums, his teacher describes him as 'quirky' and says his knowledge of science is incredible but he went on a school trip reccenty for two nights and she said he just kept on lashing out whenevr 'he didnt get his own way' and told her that he doesnt have any friends. Anyway to cut a long story short on others advice I asked his teacher if she thought it was worth assessing him, she said the paperwork was a lot and it takes so long to do that the best rout was thrugh the GP. My GPthen said that school usually bring an education psycholgist in first and so he was reluctant to refer. He also said he sounds like he has an 'aspergers type personality' but this could well just be the way that he is and that going down the assessment route may label him and do 'more harm than good'. So we are at a loss really, obviously I dont want him to feel any more differant than he already does but I thought an asssesment may help his understanding of himself and also for us have some support becase these daily tantrums are getting us down, or whether we should leave it for now?
Sorry for rambling on anyway ha if anyone is still reading thanks very much and would so much appreciate any advice, Thanks!
Hi dollydaydream, your son does sound like he has traits, but the question is, does he have it? I think you have a right to know. Your son sounds a bit like mine, who is high functioning ASD, especially with the interests, lack of social ability, and taking jokes seriously. I think it's worth getting checked out. We were referred to CAMHS (child adolescent mental health) via the speech therapists who thought my son's behaviour needed assessing. Maybe ask your GP for a referral to CAMHS who will assess him, and if they think he shows enough signs will then send him to a specialist clinic for autism assessment. It's worrying that they're in some way trying to put you off going, for fear of labelling him. Isn't it better to have that label, if indeed it is true, so you can understand him and he can get help, rather than NOT labelling him, and failing to understand his needs? Please push on for an assessment, because you have a right to know if your child is on the spectrum.