I have been suffering moderate-severe depression for over 5 years (with previous milder episodes) and have had numerous assessments with the community mental health team over this time.
These have acknowledged ongoing life trauma's and also suggested that I have a Generalised Anxiety Disorder and/or Post Traumatic Stress Disorder.
Aside from these life events which have contributed to my current mental health issues, from my earliest memories I have always had problems socially and had the feeling of 'not fitting'.
In brief, I find social interaction so anxiety producing that I actively avoid social situations. I am 39 and only manage to sustain a couple of close friendships with people that are aware of my limitations. My partner is extremely loving, but I feel as though they, to a certain degree, have taken on a carers role.
I struggle out in public in crowds - loud noises and people invading my personal space disturb me. I find making eye contact uncomfortable and despite numerous counselling sessions am still unable to explain my feelings. Discussing fact makes much more sense!
Last year I completed an on-line Autism questionaire and scored quite highly. Although aware that these should not be used for diagnosis purposes it has opened up another route of questioning which I am tentatively persuing, hence visiting this website.
I'm hesitant to discuss this with my current counsellor due to an apprehension to hearing her response.
The mental health team's suggestion for improving my mental health is to use the facilities at their centre, including special interest courses and group work! They obviously haven't listened to my issues with social interaction.
Any feedback would be appreciated.
