Am i being silly or do i have reason to think Autism???

hi all, im new to all this.. Dont really know how to explain?

I have a 4 yr old son, theres always been strange little things what niggle at me but ive always brushed them aside, until recently my mother suggested i look into Autism..

Basically im going to write a list of why i think he may have autism, i know nothing about it and would appreciate feedback on what people would suggest i should do, or even if you think im being silly i would like some advise..

His language and speech is poor, we currently have speech therapy sessions but he still suffers hugely

At times it seems like he is deaf, we even had him reffered to a hearing specialist as somethimes its so bad, they say his hearing is fine, but on the other hand he freaks out if theres a loud noise, if we go out and its busy and noise level is a bit loud he will panic and cover his ears and say its too loud? which is totally opposite to the reason we had him reffered to hearing specialist.

He never follows directions, we can repeat ourselves 10-20 times before we phisically have to stop him jumping around and listen to what were asking him to do

He will never look at us in the eyes, when we try to talk to him or get him to listen we sit down and try to talk, i ask him to look at mummy and he point blank refuses, dont know if its just being stubborn or what?

He is very obsessive about his toys, they have to be where he puts them, if i tidy them away he will go mad and empty them back out and tell me he needs to leave them where they are, he constantly has a blanket( i have managed to get it off of him while hes at nursery) and will not go anywhere without it

Hes always found it hard to play around other children, i know this before sending him nursery but his teacher has confirmed this on several occasions, i got his end of term school report and i felt really upset that she had written that he found it very hard to establish relashionships with the kids and prefered to play alone and his speech hidered him, i dont want him to feel isolated.

his teacher says he is very well behaved at school and very rarely talks, due to the fact he will play alone, but at home he is a different child, the tiniest thing can start a tantrum where hes very violent, either towards me, his little sister or basically anything in his way, it can start by something silly like asking him to get dressed or put his shoes on, he constantly jumps around and says he has to just wriggle for a while 1st? if were in a rush the situation goes from bad to worse in a matter of seconds if i try to hurry him.. the tantrums are getting unbearable as its most days..

If anyone is talking he constantly shouts over them so he his heard, when he asks for something, i have to stop what im doing immediatly otherwise he just stands there and repeats what hes saying constantly until he gets it, its like he doesnt understand how to wait? Hes very uncooperative and never does as hes told, everything has to be done his way as hes a very independant little boy, hes very intelligent but finds it hard because of his speech and relationship problems, he constantly sings, he has always been musical..

there is lots more things but i seem like im drowning on like

in infancy he had very bad colic and was impossible to feed, he never slept and head banged all the time and was constantly restless, he still doesnt sleep throughout the night now, he will never sit down for a meal, hes constantly got to wriggle or jump or spin around, he never sits and finishes a task..

 

Alll this may just be my child being normal i dont know but i am concerened after reading a little about autism, my little boy is very happy and very independant and in my eyes very intelligent apart from he cant explain himself due to the speech problems..

Am i being silly or do i have reason to be concerned?

 

  • My wee one is a twin who are the youngest of five children so I  sometimes feel this way too . Our son needs 100% asstention as well as he is a danger to himself and others around him .As he has always been like this the other children have also learned to adapt around him .They are much more accepting than most adults . We have a strict bedtime of 7pm for our twins but sometimes his brother who shows none of these signs or behaviours will get back up once he has gone to sleep and he will then get 1 to 1 ..They all understand somehow .x

     

  • Hi, thanks to the two above comments, my son is due to start mainstream school in sept this is why im a little concerned for him, i do take each day as it comes and take him away from loud situations but im starting to understand a little more now why he could be like this. He does have the odd good day where he will only tantrum maybe once, but its for no apparent reason? the other day i picked him up from nursery he was in a fab mood, all the way home in the car we spoke about what he had done(alone) and as soon as we parked the car to enter the house he just froze in the middle of the street and started his temper tantrum,for no reason i could see?? the comment you made about the cutlery hit me in the face, as he will only eat off of certain spoons what have a certain pattern on them, if i try to give him another he will refuse to eat,i thought this may be him just being naughty? The more i read about Autism the more i do think i have reason to be concerned, i really appreceate all your comments and im going to pay the health visitor a visit i think, also i will have a word with the hospital as we visit regularly for his ears and hes due back in 2 weeks, i just dont want to get fobbed off by anyone as it took me years to get him reffered to speech therapy as the health visitor just kept telling me his talking will "come on" . i find it quite hard sometimes as i have a younger child and cant give her much attention as my son has to have it 100%.. i feel like i am doing something wrong :(

  • I agree with Caro . My son is 5 and shows many of the same behaviours as yours . I found his nursery completely unhelpful when I approached  them so I went to my Health Visitor who then referred him to the local community paedatrition who specialises in ADHD and Autism . After a 4 hour home visit she diagnosed autism? .He has now been referred to other agencies such as speach therapy and social work . It is a very long process and regardless of diagnosis your child obviously has difficulties . I have found that my best policy is to try and make the world easier for him . I have spoke to the school that he will be starting and made them aware of his difficulties eg, no awareness of danger , running away , doesnt like cutlery .The list is endless . We take each day as it comes and what works one day doesnt work the next .If noises are too loud then we take him away from them .If he starts to get upset / violent or too high we sit him on our knee for a squeeze and speak camly to him about things that he is interested in .This can take a good half hour for him to calm down but it works for .   We wouldnt change him for the world . He also will be attending mainstream school in august so things will change again .We do what makes life easier for him .I hope this helps you out a little bit . Hope ive not babbled on too much x

     

  • Before I give my response I would say that generally it is more helpful for somebody with any difficulty to have that difficulty understood rather than denied or ignored.  I am also not an expert but an adult who has lived with autism all my life but was only diagnosed 3 years ago, I believe my older son (undiagnosed) also has the condition. 

    Having said that many of the traits you describe fit with autism. However I don't agree with the previous person posting that going to the GP is necessarily a good step.  I would suggest contacting the NAS or any relevant local organisation and ask their advice, since some general health professionals seem to think that autism is a negative thing and therefore they are doing patients a favour by dismissing the liklihood (or they just lack in depth understanding of the condition and are unable to recognise it).  It seems to me best that you try and find a professional who would definately be able to identify if it was likely to be present.

  • Hi Colinthecat ,

    i have spoken to nursery regarding his mood swings as he has taken a few days off due to them being so bad sometimes, she just seems to think he is trying to play me as she said, all ahe says to me is that my son is shy, timid and very solomn, he will not play with the other kids and plays alone singing to himself.. My son visits a peadiatrition about his ears every 6 months as he had scepticemia as a baby, i think i will voice my concerns next month when we visit again x

    thanks Mac159

  • Hello mac159

    Thanks so much for posting your concerns.  

    Have you discussed the situation with your son's nursery?  Have they expressed any concerns about him?  

    It may be that you should start by discussing your concerns with your GP and explaining the situation.  

    Colinthecat