• Replies 37 replies
  • Subscribers 25 subscribers
  • Views 6811 views
  • Users 0 members are here
Options
Related
Hints and tips
  • To quote someone's message, first select/highlight the relevant text, and then use the Quote button that appears
  • To "mention" someone, type @ followed by the start of the forum name, and choose from the list; that person will get a notification of being mentioned

Is diagnosis as an adult worth looking in to?

Mason

I've come here to vent more then anything, I know there's little anyone can do to help, but it would be nice to air out some concerns and have an outsiders opinion. I can't talk to my family about my concerns because they wouldn't understand. I took the test someone posted up on a sticky and it came to 8 (over 6 meaning considered for referral) and I also took another online test found linked from the embarrassing bodies website and on that I got 33 and over 32 means possibly autism spectrum

I do struggle with social situations, ive always found it difficult and Ive learned to smile and nod in the right places most of the time but that can backfire. I can't talk in groups very easily and conversation can be difficult when just talking to one person. I think I talk about things others arent interested in and pick up on things they don't notice (and again have no interest in) I have to really make a conscious effort to stop myself from coming out with facts about a topic during a conversation because I don't think I'm supposed to. Then there's things like at work, I try to remember to say hello to my co-workers but I often forget and don't know if I come off rude, same with saying goodbye to them too, I only say it in response if they say it to me. I also don't know what to say in certain situations for example a friend at work hurt her foot and I tried to be sympathetic as I know I'm supposed to and said "oh no" or sometching like that and she came back at me with "you couldn't be more sarcastic there could you" I then explained that I wasn't being sarcastic and I do care, but I don't always know how to express it.

I don't like doctors and I make a point of avoiding them at all costs and I couldn't go to him with this issue because I feel too embarrassed, it's probably nothing anyway and he'll think I'm an idiot. I sort of think, I am who I am and knowing can't change that and I've gone 27 years being who I am so I'll just have to deal with it. But it did cause problems in my last job and I ended up losing my job and then my flat and having to move back home to my parents house. That was mostly because the chef at the restaurant where I worked washing dishes at the time didn't like it when I was quiet and if I forgot to greet him or didnt join in the conversations, he thought I was in a mood when i wasn't I just didn't have anything to say, and then after time with him bullying me I developed a bit of an attitude with him when he was nasty to me and he didn't like it. The other problem it's causing is I'm 27 and never had a proper boyfriend because I just don't know how to talk to people, it gets me down and i get depressed but then when I think about it, I couldn't imagine having someons else in my space and not being able to do what I want all the time. its a difficult one and it would be good for me to know why I am the way I am, but I don't think I can fight to find it out and I know it would be a fight for it. 

What's the general view of being diagnosed as an adult, do people think it's worth it or is self diagnosis enough (I cope in life anyway so I wouldn't get any help from the doctors either way)

Parents

  • I'm nearly 70 and lived with issues all my life. It is only now that I've started making any real attempt to try and find out what might be causing them.

    I've got a nephew in his early 20s who is autistic and other members of the family have problems ranging from severe and chronic depression through to dyslexia and my grandchildren are having special help in school with attention and communication problems.

    I tried the test on this board and I got a score of 6. I tried it again and got the same score. So I'm fairly satisfied that autism isn't my problem. However, it was interesting to see where I scored: 2, 3, 4, 5, 6 and 9. I wouldn't score anything against 1, anyway, as I am slightly deaf.

    My problems have amounted to saying inappropriate things without realising it, being awkward in the company of strangers, forgetting names of people I have known for years, places I am very familiar with and commonplace objects, failing to recognise people I know very well and being unable to remember facts under stress.

    On the other hand, I passed the 11 plus, a small clutch of 'O' Levels, scraped through 1 'A' level and passed some promotion exams in work and ended up as a team leader in a reasonably responsible position. A position that I found very hard to perform in. I could do the work but I couldn't manage staff at all. I was rubbish at that.

    Along the way, I got married, my wife is has always had a disability and is now very disabled and I am her carer.  We have two kids and I suspect they both think I am a bit odd. I suspect they used to warn their friends about me. Of late, we've talked about things and I think they understand me better

    My life has actually been quite stressfull and I have had periods on anti depressents. Not that they seemmed to help me much. Ativan did more harm than good.

    The extra plusses are that my kids are both very bright, both went to university, one got a Ph.D and both have had good jobs.

    I know I have a problem and have always had it but I am no nearer discovering what it is. I don't think I would seek an assessment now even if I thought I might have autism, anyway, because I am too old.

    But if I was of Mason's age and had scored the same as her, I would have had no hesitation in pushing as hard as I could for an assessment. I wish her every luck.

    So this is hello again and probably goodbye. I have found the site very helpful. Keep up the good work.

    Thanks.

    Meldrew.

Reply

  • I'm nearly 70 and lived with issues all my life. It is only now that I've started making any real attempt to try and find out what might be causing them.

    I've got a nephew in his early 20s who is autistic and other members of the family have problems ranging from severe and chronic depression through to dyslexia and my grandchildren are having special help in school with attention and communication problems.

    I tried the test on this board and I got a score of 6. I tried it again and got the same score. So I'm fairly satisfied that autism isn't my problem. However, it was interesting to see where I scored: 2, 3, 4, 5, 6 and 9. I wouldn't score anything against 1, anyway, as I am slightly deaf.

    My problems have amounted to saying inappropriate things without realising it, being awkward in the company of strangers, forgetting names of people I have known for years, places I am very familiar with and commonplace objects, failing to recognise people I know very well and being unable to remember facts under stress.

    On the other hand, I passed the 11 plus, a small clutch of 'O' Levels, scraped through 1 'A' level and passed some promotion exams in work and ended up as a team leader in a reasonably responsible position. A position that I found very hard to perform in. I could do the work but I couldn't manage staff at all. I was rubbish at that.

    Along the way, I got married, my wife is has always had a disability and is now very disabled and I am her carer.  We have two kids and I suspect they both think I am a bit odd. I suspect they used to warn their friends about me. Of late, we've talked about things and I think they understand me better

    My life has actually been quite stressfull and I have had periods on anti depressents. Not that they seemmed to help me much. Ativan did more harm than good.

    The extra plusses are that my kids are both very bright, both went to university, one got a Ph.D and both have had good jobs.

    I know I have a problem and have always had it but I am no nearer discovering what it is. I don't think I would seek an assessment now even if I thought I might have autism, anyway, because I am too old.

    But if I was of Mason's age and had scored the same as her, I would have had no hesitation in pushing as hard as I could for an assessment. I wish her every luck.

    So this is hello again and probably goodbye. I have found the site very helpful. Keep up the good work.

    Thanks.

    Meldrew.

Children
No Data