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I've been so stupid. I just need to tell it

Dogtooth

So firstly I don't want sympathy or kind words. I'm not fishing. I just need to get this in the open so it's not bottled up. 

I'm alone this weekend for the first time in a while. I've managed to properly screw it all up. 

Firstly I upset my boss yesterday and I didn't need to. I was thoughtless and now she isn't replying to me. She is one of my best friends. I should have put her first. 

Then the anxiety kicked in. I'm not gonna give details but I made the worst decision ever. I spent all night taking narcotics. I haven't slept at all. 

I'm now drinking red wine feeling like a total tool. Why do I keep going round this track. 

The definition of insanity is doing the same things over and over expecting a different result. 

OK. Thats me done. I've told it. At least I've told it. 

Parents

  • Hey, it’s not last night anymore, it’s a new day. No doubt you’re going to feel pretty shitty today anyway, after what you took last night. And that’s just going to make all of those feelings so much stronger. We all mess up, all of the time, anyone that says they don’t is a liar. Concentrate on you today, dehydrate, feed yourself, write a list of everything you do do well at. Then later on when you feel slightly better, write an apology to your friend. If they really are that greater friend you’ll be able to sort things out. As crap as you feel right now, it’s okay :) 

  • in reply to Briar

    Thank you brother. 

    You have no idea how much you amongst others have lifted me today. 

    I'm in your debt 

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