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Wife Wants to Help with Autistic Exhaustion

Luftmentsch

I was struggling with autistic exhaustion the other week and worried about it turning into burnout. My wife (we’re fully married now) asked what she could do to help me and I wasn’t sure.

When I get autistically exhausted I try to focus on spending time alone in the quiet; engaging in relatively passive entertainment (re-watching science fiction TV I know backwards or reading graphic novels like Asterix or Tintin); going for walks in non-busy areas and just trying to take off some of the obligations imposed by society or my busy superego (where possible). But I’m not really sure what my wife could do for me in this situation, other than reminding me that I can do these things, as I tend to get into autistic rigidity and forget that I could/should take time out in these ways. Does anyone have any other ideas?

Getting to nature isn’t easy where we live, but we could sometimes go to Golders Hill Park or Hampstead Heath, or even a short walk in the local park (if it’s not overrun with dogs illegally off-leash) so that’s another thing we can try.

Parents

  • Just a quick idea, and therefore quite possibly not a great one, but is it an option for her to read of other autistic peoples experiences of exhaustion and use these as discussion starters to see if those experiences are relevant to you or not? I know each experience is different and that there are differences in the way that each autistic person experiences these sorts of things, but these are sort of shared in there core basis and therefore might make an okay starting point. I think the strongest thing is open communication and this is perhaps a way of continuing this process? I’m just thinking ‘out loud’ really, so please feel free to ignore and or critique if it’s not a good idea. Your question is a very good one to be honest and would stump me if I was asked the same.

    I think Number’s reply is yet another great one and it summarises many of the things I would have said.

    Also, a huge congratulations on your marriage.

Reply

  • Just a quick idea, and therefore quite possibly not a great one, but is it an option for her to read of other autistic peoples experiences of exhaustion and use these as discussion starters to see if those experiences are relevant to you or not? I know each experience is different and that there are differences in the way that each autistic person experiences these sorts of things, but these are sort of shared in there core basis and therefore might make an okay starting point. I think the strongest thing is open communication and this is perhaps a way of continuing this process? I’m just thinking ‘out loud’ really, so please feel free to ignore and or critique if it’s not a good idea. Your question is a very good one to be honest and would stump me if I was asked the same.

    I think Number’s reply is yet another great one and it summarises many of the things I would have said.

    Also, a huge congratulations on your marriage.

Children