People Leaving Site.

I often look at how well you can all express yourselves and write so eloquently. I can’t and often delete a lot of what I write, what I do write always seems to be disjointed, I have come to realise that I am quite dyslexic. I often wonder if I belong, I sometimes look at profiles and see large friend lists. I’m not looking for friends, I just sometimes feel like an outcast, I do know that most of you are friendly, I think I beat myself up sometimes and think no, I’m not autistic, I then spend a few hours out in the world and then know that I am autistic.  Maths and codes, I can see the answers, writing is really hard.  Sorry I’m just having a bit of a wobble today.

Roy, please don’t go. I mean don’t feel trapped either, but you know what I mean. You’d be missed. Yours is one of those reassuring voices I’ve got to know well and you express yourself perfectly well.I’m sorry to hear that you struggle with writing sometimes (I have good and bad days on that front) but it makes me sad to think of you deleting stuff that I’m sure would be perfectly fit for purpose, and relatable stuff that can only add to the overall sense of community. 

Thank you for your reply, I know you understand, I’ve just been struggling lately. I decided to try friendship with someone, it’s not something I normally do, anyway my wife started chatting to a couple in our village pub, we have chatted a few times now and I thought I had gauged the husband as being okay. He is a solicitor but bought up in the East End of London, he said how his parents still refer to some of his friends by their colour, I said that it is most probably a generational thing. I then thought okay and said,”my mother is the same with me being autistic, she doesn’t accept me being different,” I don’t normally tell anyone, he then put his hand on my shoulder which spiked me and said,”we are all a little bit autistic and on the spectrum somewhere.” I’ve never actually had that comment. I just felt angry, hurt and invalidated. I’ve now stopped engaging with him. It’s just been annoying me, I’ve read that it’s a reply that does happen but never have experienced it. I know it’s only a silly thing but it’s just put me off people again. I know you have been struggling as well, these little things are just another turn of the screw.

Obviously, I would never use the term ‘ mud bloods’ either. My youngest son in conversation uses the term,” I’m picking up, what you’re putting down.” 

Roy, I have a confession to make. Before I joined this site and saw other members talking about the 'muggles', the only times I used it was in relation to Harry Potter. 

Thank you, I just thought, he’s highly educated and would understand. You would be even more surprised if I told you what job his wife has in a school. I’m going to steal your muggle comment! It made me chuckle.

Thank you, I just thought, he’s highly educated and would understand. You would be even more surprised if I told you what job his wife has in a school. I’m going to steal your muggle comment! It made me chuckle.

Obviously, I would never use the term ‘ mud bloods’ either. My youngest son in conversation uses the term,” I’m picking up, what you’re putting down.” 

Roy, I have a confession to make. Before I joined this site and saw other members talking about the 'muggles', the only times I used it was in relation to Harry Potter.