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Does my brother have Aspergers? (ASD Genetic??) Help!

zvix88

Hey Everyone,

My 2yr old daughter is supect ASD with an assessment in June, and I was basically pondering on the possibility that its genetic and if it is the case does my brother have Aspergers??

My brother is 27 now. He had and still has really bad learning difficuties and went to a special school as a child. The doctors were never able to mention anything specific..anyway... I remember him having speech therapy as a child and he alwaysssss had a bad temper, he'd get so angry and get really aggressive over the slighest little thing. He still does it to this day if he doesn't get his own way.

He has obsessions over football, theatre and racing cars, and used to sit infront of the washing machine, watching it spin, kept him occupied for hours as a kid, along with his train set that went round and round. If hes unable to go to a football game or a show he really wants to see etc he gets mad. Bacially goes into a right one over anything hes unable to do that he really wants to and taps his head a lot when hes getting stressed out.

Most of the time trying to get him to understand that he cant act the way he does is like talking to a child, he doesnt seem to process whats wrong and whats right. He cant tie shoelaces and has trouble keeping up his personal appearence. With life things he cant manage finances, has trouble making friends, got bullied a lot and still does!

Is this Aspergers? What shall we do? How do we tell him if it is?

It would make sense as to how my lil one has suspect ASD, I dont think she has the Aspergers part though as shes such a lovely bubbly lil princess, she has strops but never as bad as my brother.

  • Hi

    What you are going through is the beginning of the journey towards ?a diagnosis?Statement.  Emotionally this is a horrible time for you and your nearest and dearest.  I too wanted to know if this ran in our family, looked up loads of info on the internet, was given lots of often conflicting information from lots of professional and non professional people.  What you start to expereince is a heightened sense of sensitivity about the situation and this can often almost consume your every waking, living and breathing moment in life.  Just like a bereavement this journey is one that you must do until you reach acceptance in your own way of your situation.  You are not alone - lonliness was one of the strongest feelings I felt for a long time.  There are many people out there who share this journey at some point in their life.  Just like in this forum some have got the diagnosis, some are half way through, some never got one and some did not want one.  If we look positively however for you personally on your journey - you are being given a gift that everyone will not be given.  You will learn to have an appreciation of your child like no other.  You will begin to see that no matter what the outcome - your child is a very special little person in her own right.  A child without limits almost.  Once you get through the paperwork process - and it will come to an end believe you me at some point, then you can get on with living and establishing some normality and routine to your life.  You will be in a position to understand other mums who have children that are special.  I have found that I am the haven for my neighbourhood for all socially excluded kids - even those in our typical white neighbourhood who have mixed parentage!  It gives you a broader sense of life and also makes you a better person who will value so many other more important things in life in the future than money and material wealth.  You write to me again in say a years time and tell me that you have not learned something from this that is good.  I dare you. 

  • Nobody but a trained psychologist can tell you whether your brother is on the Autistic Spectrum or not.

    What you describe sounds like it could be the product of any one of many conditions.

    However, it is correct that Autism has a very strong genetic component, so if your daughter is on the autistic spectrum, it certainly increases the likelyhood that both you and your brother are also.

    Or perhaps it is your daughter's father that is.

    Or both.

    Or none of the above.

    All these are very real possibilities.

  • Hey, thanks for your reply.

    Well.. we dont have contact with our mother, but I did speak to dad about it earlier, had to fill him in on what its all about and why I thought it was maybe aspergers, he was like oh right then maybe we could get answers n bros been let down a lot by people who are supposed to care for him, support workers etc in the past they just put him into the challenging/couldnt be bothered dept and said if he kicked off again then the support would end and that was that .. so yeah I dont know maybe a assessment would benefit him getting the help he needs.

    I would say a diagnosis for my bab is definitly on the cards.. call it mothers instinct, her paediatriction is convinced - said so when I mentioned it to her, and lil ones speech therapist caught onto it before I did but again only said that after I mentioned it. Thy've sent us a letter for the ADOS assessment just have to wait still over a month away.. horrible waiting. x

  • Hi - it can be a very emotional time waiting for an assessment + possible diagnosis so I can understand why you are wondering about your brother whilst all this is going on.  You don't mention your parents, so I was wondering what they think about an assessment for him.  An assessment/diagnosis for him wd be useful if he isn't getting the care and/or understanding that he needs.  It sounds like life is pretty tough for him sometimes + always has been.  You will have a good idea how he may react to going through the process, whether he would appreciate why it was worth doing.  If things aren't going to change in any way for the better for him, then I think you need to query whether it's worth it or not.  If he is diagnosed then it must lead to an improved quality of life for him, in my opinion. I also think you shd take things 1 step at a time because it is easier to handle that way.  Regardless of whether your brother has autism or not, the assessment process for your daughter will begin soon + will come to a conclusion with a diagnosis (or not).  So I suppose I'm saying you don't necessarily need to link your daughter + brother together, altho I understand how it would help you to understand if there's autism in the family.  I understand how you see the 2 of them as connected but I wouldn't rush into anything without thinking all the implications through so that both can get the best possible outcome for them as individuals with particular needs.  best wishes with everything.