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What Can I do, What Would You Do or Have Done?

NAS75473

Hi,

Its my first time on this forums I'm looking for some advice and I hope I've put this in the right place in the forum, I'm currently waiting for an adult diagnoses of ASD believed to be Aspergers I struggle with everything it feels like at times, from processing information to communicating how I feel or any information I've been waiting 17 months now for a diagnoses and minimum 18 but could be longer.

The issue I have is my partner has a community nurse that helps her due to having learning disabilities I'd say on the same level with what I struggle with but are slightly different to what's wrong with me I other process information she under processes information. Sadly though I asked the nurse if there's any support for me pre diagnose and post diagnose she said there is no help in the local area and now she has pushed my partners issues on to me to give her more support but I seriously can't comprehend what to do, I've been told I have to explain stuff in a more simple form which I struggle to do as I can't explain anything simply, I have to take control of more responsibilities and schedule everything. This is leading to serious anxiety and depressive state. I've tried discussing it with my partner but the community nurse is for her not for me so I don't know what I can do. 

To add I've tried talk therapies, they say they can't help me till I've had a diagnoses as the treatment for any anxiety may not be fair on me. (they were the ones who referred me to ASD)

What can I do?

Is there any help?

I'm hoping this forum gives me a voice thanks.

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  • NAS75473 said:
    I've been told I have to explain stuff in a more simple form which I struggle to do as I can't explain anything simply,

    20 years ago I was with someone who had a profound realisation one day that I "process out loud". He must have been trying to work out what I was going on about. That was a step two. 5 years prior, a friend made a comment that I apparently just said whatever I was thinking and somewhat made fun of it. I didn't learn until after step 2 that it wasn't necessary to say everything out loud I was thinking (or as it was described, to be a 'leaky faucet'). These were things my parents should've helped me understand. But I found myself silent around them. My father didn't have the patience and my mother won't recollect a thing.

    Fast forward and it takes a great deal of work to understand all the processes which go into formal or even informal communication. It's rather extensive. But fundamental principles have helped. And also, strangely, reading amazing journalism. Commentary sections are fantastic for exquisite linguists. I've come to appreciate the 'sport' of clear and clever communication. Still, I'm not always precise... excellent novelists the same. 

    I write things out as well. Actually this helps. I took a logic class & love philosophy - this has also helped. But working through thoughts by recording them into my phone and writing them into a document or as mentioned, examining how the Pro's convey information, has really done wonders for matters of communication. I default to pragmatics and have learned to help others appreciate it - I will always have difficulty with social nuances and evolution with language and that is authentically me. But then I also adore writers and philosophers who squeeze every inch of meaning from a word. Orwell or Chesterton - one finds these types existed 50-100 years or more ago. 

    Anyway, welcome!

  • in reply to JuniperFromGallifrey

    Thank you for the insight, currently it feels like there is no room to move on myself but you've opened my eyes. It may take time and I think its important to realize change is necessary bad but if done right.

    I will continue to post on this forum this is a way to express myself and have a voice thanks.

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