Over Eating

I don't eat enough and I'm underweight, so I have the opposite that happens. Instead of an emotional eater, I'm an emotional worker, if there was ever such a term. I work when I'm happy, sad, stressed, that I prioritize work over food. I mean I like eating food and I'm not terrified of fat or anything, but when I have something to work on, I'll hold off on eating food for hours. I did a workaholic type of quiz, and I scored very high in it. I mean I don't work for money, but because there's a satisfaction from doing it. I just work on a project or do something that captures my interest. I don't know how to stop and take breaks to eat food. I'll let food get cold. I've developed some routines to get me to eat, but they don't work all the time. 

This makes me think of the models of girls everyone sees in msinstream media, who are all skinny, smiling, and their image is intertwined with the words health and beauty. These images are everywhere, that this became the unfortunate standard of how girls and women should look like to be considered healthy, that these images even influences doctors.

Even though it's well known that many models have eating disorders to keep themselves as thin as possible for their job, they are constantly under stress and they're not healthy, and they're suffering, but you can't tell because the photos of them show them otherwise (happy, confident, smiling). And the issue I have is that even if I'm not eating much, I'm famished, I'm weak, and I'm fatigued, I have an issue with eating enough food, the doctor does not take it seriously, because I mistakenly look healthy (by mainstream standards) to him, and then he just sends me on my way. When really, if I'm as skinny as those models, and those models have eating disorders, then naturally the doctor should actually conclude that I need to change my eating habits and get me on the right path right away. But instead, nothing happens, and I am sent on my way.

I don't eat enough and I'm underweight, so I have the opposite that happens. Instead of an emotional eater, I'm an emotional worker, if there was ever such a term. I work when I'm happy, sad, stressed, that I prioritize work over food. I mean I like eating food and I'm not terrified of fat or anything, but when I have something to work on, I'll hold off on eating food for hours. I did a workaholic type of quiz, and I scored very high in it. I mean I don't work for money, but because there's a satisfaction from doing it. I just work on a project or do something that captures my interest. I don't know how to stop and take breaks to eat food. I'll let food get cold. I've developed some routines to get me to eat, but they don't work all the time. 

This makes me think of the models of girls everyone sees in msinstream media, who are all skinny, smiling, and their image is intertwined with the words health and beauty. These images are everywhere, that this became the unfortunate standard of how girls and women should look like to be considered healthy, that these images even influences doctors.

Even though it's well known that many models have eating disorders to keep themselves as thin as possible for their job, they are constantly under stress and they're not healthy, and they're suffering, but you can't tell because the photos of them show them otherwise (happy, confident, smiling). And the issue I have is that even if I'm not eating much, I'm famished, I'm weak, and I'm fatigued, I have an issue with eating enough food, the doctor does not take it seriously, because I mistakenly look healthy (by mainstream standards) to him, and then he just sends me on my way. When really, if I'm as skinny as those models, and those models have eating disorders, then naturally the doctor should actually conclude that I need to change my eating habits and get me on the right path right away. But instead, nothing happens, and I am sent on my way.