• Replies 29 replies
  • Subscribers 25 subscribers
  • Views 13942 views
  • Users 0 members are here
Options
Related
Hints and tips
  • To quote someone's message, first select/highlight the relevant text, and then use the Quote button that appears
  • To "mention" someone, type @ followed by the start of the forum name, and choose from the list; that person will get a notification of being mentioned

Selective Mutism - any advice?

Pageant

Hello everyone,

My eight year old daughter is soon to be assessed for ASD and I expect there will be a diagnosis of ASD/Aspergers.

One of the most significant problems she faces is selective mutism.  She is terrified of talking to people she doesn't know well (i.e. everyone except parents, brother and one friend she made at her old school).  Even Grandma/Grandad have trouble getting her to speak, although she speaks freely with her immediate family.  Everything I've read suggests it's an anxiety response and she is extremely self-conscious in general.  With us though, she's a different girl - happy, funny and giggly a lot of the time.  She'll occasionally be like this with others, but it's fleeting and never seems to last.

Anyone got any ideas for how to help?  I've read a lot about selective mutism unrelated to autism, but the strategies there suggest something more of a pure phobia about speaking.  With my daughter, I think it's different - it's anxiety about social communication (not surprisingly)...  I'm worried it could get worse, but don't know how to stem the tide of any regression (mercifully, she just recently started talking to her childminder again who she goes to once a week, but I've been worried there's been a general regressive trend lately, aside from this).

Any ideas would be very welcome.  Autism-related literature on the subject is thin on the ground - or I'm looking in the wrong places....

Parents

  • The advice on the first page of the Autism UK site lists the types of sensitivities that people have. This is useful to help determine what fears/senses are causing the problem. One of mine is I have an acute sense of smell and alexithymia. I had SM from ages 2-6. I am 61 now. I remember now that I was aware/fearful of everything and when someone talked to me, my reaction time was reduced because of this fear (due to the proximity of someone (smelly) being close to me) and by the time I was ready to respond the moment to respond was over. Over time, because of this delay, it was easier to stay silent. Read "Selective Mutism in our own words" by Carl Sutton and Cheryl Forrester ISBN 978 1 84905 636 6. A safe environment to talk is home where environmental conditions are known (familiar sounds, smells). A new environment like school for an SM child can only be understood by someone who is maybe partially aware (empathic)of the child's sensory environment. Some well-meaning NeuroTypicals (ordinary normal people) are unaware of themselves (smell - e.g. cortisol, pheromones) to be able to help. 

Reply

  • The advice on the first page of the Autism UK site lists the types of sensitivities that people have. This is useful to help determine what fears/senses are causing the problem. One of mine is I have an acute sense of smell and alexithymia. I had SM from ages 2-6. I am 61 now. I remember now that I was aware/fearful of everything and when someone talked to me, my reaction time was reduced because of this fear (due to the proximity of someone (smelly) being close to me) and by the time I was ready to respond the moment to respond was over. Over time, because of this delay, it was easier to stay silent. Read "Selective Mutism in our own words" by Carl Sutton and Cheryl Forrester ISBN 978 1 84905 636 6. A safe environment to talk is home where environmental conditions are known (familiar sounds, smells). A new environment like school for an SM child can only be understood by someone who is maybe partially aware (empathic)of the child's sensory environment. Some well-meaning NeuroTypicals (ordinary normal people) are unaware of themselves (smell - e.g. cortisol, pheromones) to be able to help. 

Children
No Data