Selective Mutism - any advice?

Hello everyone,

My eight year old daughter is soon to be assessed for ASD and I expect there will be a diagnosis of ASD/Aspergers.

One of the most significant problems she faces is selective mutism.  She is terrified of talking to people she doesn't know well (i.e. everyone except parents, brother and one friend she made at her old school).  Even Grandma/Grandad have trouble getting her to speak, although she speaks freely with her immediate family.  Everything I've read suggests it's an anxiety response and she is extremely self-conscious in general.  With us though, she's a different girl - happy, funny and giggly a lot of the time.  She'll occasionally be like this with others, but it's fleeting and never seems to last.

Anyone got any ideas for how to help?  I've read a lot about selective mutism unrelated to autism, but the strategies there suggest something more of a pure phobia about speaking.  With my daughter, I think it's different - it's anxiety about social communication (not surprisingly)...  I'm worried it could get worse, but don't know how to stem the tide of any regression (mercifully, she just recently started talking to her childminder again who she goes to once a week, but I've been worried there's been a general regressive trend lately, aside from this).

Any ideas would be very welcome.  Autism-related literature on the subject is thin on the ground - or I'm looking in the wrong places....

Parents
  • Thanks jojo - its good to hear that things can work out.  We have the book you mention - I bought that when our daughter was 4 in Reception and the problems first became apparent.  Last year we bought the Selective Mutism resource manual which is a fantastic book and has been far more help than any professional.  We have been using this to do sliding in through year 3 and now in Year 4 but have made little to no progress.  There has been some advice/input from SALT, CAMHS, Play therapy and the sliding in we have been doing at school.  Ourselves we have tried homeopathy, hypnosis and neurodevelopment therapy.  Alongside lots of opportunities to try social activities and play dates etc.  Its therefore very worrying to be now nearly 9 years of age in Year 4 - with secondary school looming and still have no speech to adults within or out of school and only a select few children.  This is what is making me think we need to drive things forward and try for a statement so some more structured help would have to be put in place.  So far the services involved have not worked one to one with our daughter - purely advice to us as parents. 

     

    I hope things continue to go well for you.  It does seem to be a lottery with regard to schools and services and how much support is given.

Reply
  • Thanks jojo - its good to hear that things can work out.  We have the book you mention - I bought that when our daughter was 4 in Reception and the problems first became apparent.  Last year we bought the Selective Mutism resource manual which is a fantastic book and has been far more help than any professional.  We have been using this to do sliding in through year 3 and now in Year 4 but have made little to no progress.  There has been some advice/input from SALT, CAMHS, Play therapy and the sliding in we have been doing at school.  Ourselves we have tried homeopathy, hypnosis and neurodevelopment therapy.  Alongside lots of opportunities to try social activities and play dates etc.  Its therefore very worrying to be now nearly 9 years of age in Year 4 - with secondary school looming and still have no speech to adults within or out of school and only a select few children.  This is what is making me think we need to drive things forward and try for a statement so some more structured help would have to be put in place.  So far the services involved have not worked one to one with our daughter - purely advice to us as parents. 

     

    I hope things continue to go well for you.  It does seem to be a lottery with regard to schools and services and how much support is given.

Children
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