Got diagnosis but my partner won't believe it

The label is not there to make your some different its there to help him to be treated equally to everyone else, so he can acheive what others can. my mum refused to let the Ed psy see me 29 years ago when I was 5, it would have made my teanage years much easier if I had known, didn't get a diagnosis till I was 19. All that time not forfilling my full potential, being treated like I was dumb because I couldn't express myself in the same way as my peers. Feeling depressed sometimes suicidal because I felt so odd and axuious. 

If your partnerwas ill would he not take some head ache tablets, if the sun was in his eyes would he not put some sunglasses on, if the tele was to quiet would he not turn it up, if he was tired would he not think I need some extra sleep.

A diagnosis of ASD is just an explanation of why someone behaves in a perticuler way and from that people can devis stratergies to help that person cope better in sociaty. Maybe if your partner sees your son in himself, its hard for him to come to terms with, especially if he has always felt he has got by with out any 'special treatment', why would his son need it. Maybe some suttle hints would help, leatlets, books and computer left on, he will look at them in his own times, if he to has ASD your asking a lot of him to come to terms with. leave the information around for him to come to terms with and just tell him that its the pead has a professional obligation to inform these other organisations. 

My partner never agree with all this psycological mumbo jumbo if he can't see it then its not broken, however over time, living with me and my kids he not only understands  our idisyncraces I think deep down he knows he has his own, but I would never force that issue. At the end of the day he is him and I is me, I only use my diagnosis to get a more even playing feild in my studies.

good luck x

My husband is in denial too.  He says he believes it but I know he doesn't truly.  He has spent years denying it and saying the behaviours were down to my parenting etc.

I can't speak for your husband, but men generally have huge egos.  I think it's a dent to their manhood that they think they are being accused of seeding "faulty" offspring.  So they deny it.

I told my husband about my youngest child's diagnosis today and he didn't ask for any further details.

I guess because he may not be able to see it, he doesn't believe it.

Bounces dad knew he had ASD before Dx (we both had a gut feeling) anyhow since dx he has struggled to deal with issues that arrise and half the time I tell him what Bounce has been up to or how bad my nyte was or the fact that I havent slept in 48hours straight he really does struggle to accept it!!

Unfortunately he is the same with other 4 who have special needs and calls other 2 NT nerds!!!! Pathetic I know but I know he has issues himself and he has only addmitted it once in 25 years

Some people take time to accept dx, try and get him involved with issues and if not listening to you leave documents about has if on purpose for him to view on his own accord.

Has mentioned above everyone needs to be informed so your son gets the best possible help and support, if this dont happen more problems could arise educationally etc. I would definetly get a statutory assessment done, you can request one yourself and SEN Parent Partnership can help you with this and other issues.

My little Bounce was just dx June 2012 3 months short of his 5th birthday and even to this day I do struggle to understand it all but it does take time.

Thanks for your reply.  My son is 5.  I'll have a look around other posts.

My man is exactly the same. We got the diagnois just before Xmas and he hasn't even looked at any of the info. I've registered on here, bought a book from the website, sent a few emails and have an appointment with the carers trust later this week. I don't know if it is his ego but he doesn't seem to believe the result. we need to work together and Im sure he will in time. It's very difficult :-(

hi - how old is your son?  There are posts on here about parents not wanting to accept the diagnosis, so have a look.  You'll know it's v important that his gp + school are informed.  You shd also ask for a statement of educational needs so that your son gets the support he needs in school, that's important as well.  Has your husband explained why he doesn't accept the diagnosis?  If you haven't already, have a good look around the posts, inc those about statementing, schooling, etc.  There's also loads on info in the home page.  There's the nas helpline.   I hope things resolve for you soon - it must be difficult, but it's important that your son gets the help he needs.  Some people say they don't want their child "labelled".  I don't regard it as a label - I regard it as a diagnosis.  Without the diagnosis my son wdn't have been in the right educational setting, we wouldn't have been entitled to respite care or a social worker.  He wouldn't have been offered a place in supported living or got the benefits he was entitled to over the yrs.  It has also enabled me to understand him so much better.  bw