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So desperate :( have hit rock bottom with statement process, any help appreciated :(

Midnight

Hi.. I have an 8 year old wee man with Asperger's/HFA and a borderline visual impairment in a mainstream environment, I also believe he has CVI (but we have an uncooperative eye doc who says it's 'just his ASD') and severe Dyslexia and Dyscalcula (but they won't test until he's 12 apparently)

I had thought the statement process was going well. We had to appeal once with further information, once we got it it progressed well. We just had the final appointment - the medical. We're waiting for the typed notes to get to the LEA and they will be sending out a provisional statement - our request was very simple - that he requires a specialist ASD provision (there is an ASD school ages 5-19, Abbots Lea).

It has been a five year uphill tooth and nail roller coaster of a battle to get this far. We've been misled, downright lied to, and had conflicting 'facts' bandied about every step of the way and it has nearly broken me. (I also have a systemic autoimmune disease so..meh!)

I called for an update today - it looks like they will be happy to name the provision. But then the whammer - 'I'm sorry to break it to you, but you do know there is a 2 year waiting list for Abbots Lea, if not longer? Did no one tell you?'

Cry

He won't even be in junior school any more by the time he goes.

I'm SO desperate I will do ANYTHING to help him - does anyone know what on Earth I can do?! We have been refused a 1:1 assistant due to there not being a physical/severe behavioural issue. There is no other ASD accredited provision.

Can I volunteer as his 1:1 assistant myself in school for three days a week? Is it legally allowed? I have run out of options. I don't know who/where else to go. 

I will be homeschooling him until he can go if I can't fix this somehow. I'm trying to do my degree and become a teacher so it will be a massive sacrifice to our future as a family ... and also my wellbeing (he is full on!!!!) this is just a nightmare. 

Also, is there any kind of mental health support going?! I don't want anti depressants (yuck) but this is really getting too much.

Thanks so much Cry

PS - he is receiving lliterally nothing in school at the moment. The class teaching assistant has been cut down to two days a week and isn't even 5:1 when she works with him. He's basically sitting there twiddling his thumbs in a state of confusion. We hve been told that he will continue receiving nothing even with the provision named, until he can go!!!!!!!

Parents

  • hi Midnight - I really feel for you and your son.  We had something similar but fortunately the school he was originally at was good and we got there in the end.  But it is an awful slog which no-one should have to go through....fighting the system You'll have gathered it's all about money and local government is being squeezed very tightly.  If you haven't, then I'd ring the nas for advice.  If there is a waiting list for the school of your choice (there was with the one I wanted my son to go to) then that's difficult unless something unusual happens to reduce it.  So as you know, it's getting better provision in mainstream in the meantime.  Normally you can appeal an LEA decision.  I mention this because you haven't said whether you've done this.  The nas advice should point a way forward for you.  I think you're at the stage where the gloves are truely off and you chuck everything you can at them.  The LEA is powerful but it isn't the end of the process so that's where you need to get advice from nas.  The LEA will want you to throw in the towel (I nearly did).  Then someone asked me if I'd done everything I could?  I gave it another go, threatening them with a tribunal and the secretary of state, if I remember things correctly.....quite a long time ago, so things may have changed.  If something's going to cost them, perhaps a lot, then they may reappraise their decision about a teaching asst etc.  But get the nas adviced.....mine is patchy!

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  • hi Midnight - I really feel for you and your son.  We had something similar but fortunately the school he was originally at was good and we got there in the end.  But it is an awful slog which no-one should have to go through....fighting the system You'll have gathered it's all about money and local government is being squeezed very tightly.  If you haven't, then I'd ring the nas for advice.  If there is a waiting list for the school of your choice (there was with the one I wanted my son to go to) then that's difficult unless something unusual happens to reduce it.  So as you know, it's getting better provision in mainstream in the meantime.  Normally you can appeal an LEA decision.  I mention this because you haven't said whether you've done this.  The nas advice should point a way forward for you.  I think you're at the stage where the gloves are truely off and you chuck everything you can at them.  The LEA is powerful but it isn't the end of the process so that's where you need to get advice from nas.  The LEA will want you to throw in the towel (I nearly did).  Then someone asked me if I'd done everything I could?  I gave it another go, threatening them with a tribunal and the secretary of state, if I remember things correctly.....quite a long time ago, so things may have changed.  If something's going to cost them, perhaps a lot, then they may reappraise their decision about a teaching asst etc.  But get the nas adviced.....mine is patchy!

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