4 yr old daughter- social communication disorder?

My daughter is being assessed for social communication disorder, she had her first appointment with paediatrician in May and we're still waiting for final assessment...! I believe it to be 'an aspect of' aspergers/autism, one of 3 parts of it.  I think my daughter also has the other characteristics of autism, but not severly, they don't affect her life, whereas the social communication problems do. I think of it as being 'beyond shy' she wants to play with other children, she wants to be part of what is going on around her, but she seems to be so terrified of getting it wrong or something that she is paralysed and can't so much as look at them. Her speech is very advanced - she was using 9 word sentences when she reached her 2nd birthday, but its been suggested that the way she uses it is 'unusual' in that she talks 'at' you rather than 'with' you, and only then with a few very close relations.  She has been taking dance classes for a year and she insists on sitting on a chair at the side, with her hands over her ears, she says she enjoys going but that it makes her sad that 'the other children don't play with me'.  She also won't dress herself or use the toilet herself, which I don't know if its part of it.  She used to bite her nails til they bled when she was 18 months old - I think she just finds life excrutiatingly terrifying and it breaks my heart that I don't know how to help.  I'm hoping that once we get a diagnosis we'll be offered some help and guidance, I'm dreading her starting school next year, because I just don't think the teachers will understand her, and they'll think she's doing fine because she's quiet, whereas she'll actually be spending 9-3 absolutely terrified and praying for home time to arrive.

My daughter is being assessed for social communication disorder, she had her first appointment with paediatrician in May and we're still waiting for final assessment...! I believe it to be 'an aspect of' aspergers/autism, one of 3 parts of it.  I think my daughter also has the other characteristics of autism, but not severly, they don't affect her life, whereas the social communication problems do. I think of it as being 'beyond shy' she wants to play with other children, she wants to be part of what is going on around her, but she seems to be so terrified of getting it wrong or something that she is paralysed and can't so much as look at them. Her speech is very advanced - she was using 9 word sentences when she reached her 2nd birthday, but its been suggested that the way she uses it is 'unusual' in that she talks 'at' you rather than 'with' you, and only then with a few very close relations.  She has been taking dance classes for a year and she insists on sitting on a chair at the side, with her hands over her ears, she says she enjoys going but that it makes her sad that 'the other children don't play with me'.  She also won't dress herself or use the toilet herself, which I don't know if its part of it.  She used to bite her nails til they bled when she was 18 months old - I think she just finds life excrutiatingly terrifying and it breaks my heart that I don't know how to help.  I'm hoping that once we get a diagnosis we'll be offered some help and guidance, I'm dreading her starting school next year, because I just don't think the teachers will understand her, and they'll think she's doing fine because she's quiet, whereas she'll actually be spending 9-3 absolutely terrified and praying for home time to arrive.