Feeling fobbed off

So, recently I went to my doctor's to discuss possible routes for getting a diagnosis. They referred me to an organisation that mostly deal with anxiety to help with that aspect of my makeup but was advised to mention the Asperger's as they might be able to help.

I brought it up at the session I attended but feel like I was fobbed off. They asked me why I thought I may have Asperger's and so gave a few examples, although my mind did go blank so probably didn't do myself justice.

Their response was that "it is obvious if someone has Asperger's as they always come across as rude".

I felt abit offended at this as surely this is a generalisation?

They followed it up with "everyone has some autistic traits" 

She claimed that I was just shy..which I don't know how she could come to these conclusions within 15 minutes of meeting me.

Does anyone here think Asperger's is obvious to detect in either yourself or other people?

Or has anyone here felt like they have been fobbed off?

  • Martian Tom said:
    They've gotten used to wearing masks, and can often wear them so well that they're undetectable. 

    Cracking statement.....I can so identify with that. Thanks Dogsbody 

  • I got 35 on my pre-diagnostic.  Since then, I've taken it several more times and given a lot more thought to some of my answers, realising that perhaps I needed to moderate some things slightly.  To my surprise, my last score was 42!

    That score puts you well within the range.  I'd return to your GP with it if you want to pursue it.  Either that or see if you can find a GP who might be more willing to listen properly and make a referral. 

  • Thank you for the link.

    I have just done the test and I got 37.

  • Very much like me. I tick all of those boxes. 

    If you've not tried the test, have a go and see how you get on.  It's here:

    AQ Test

  • Sorry about the slow reply have been just taking time to word a proper response to your question.

    Some traits I exhibit include struggling socially where I won't know what to say or how to connect and in groups I struggle to keep track of the conversation and will usually zone out.

    I am terrible at picking up others body language or working out other people's mood or whether they are joking or not.

    I struggle also with displaying my own emotions or sometimes even knowing how I feel or if I do recognise I feel upset for example, why I even feel that way.

    Other traits I have include processing information, very narrow range of interests, constant feeling of being different or an outsider, repetitive behaviours or routines etc.

  • I was made to see an occupational health doctor of that sort. I told him a counsellor had suggested that and he simply dismissed it, he didn't even bother to tell me the reasons. It's possible that I would still have my job if he hadn't been so ignorant (whether that would be a good thing is a different question though).

  • What an absolute load of rubbish.  Who are these idiots?  That's not me being rude - just factual.

    I'd feel more than a bit offended.  But I've come across this kind of thing before, with an 'expert' psychiatrist telling me that I couldn't be autistic because I wasn't flapping my hands or rocking in my chair.

    'Everyone has autistic traits' is another old chestnut.  True in some senses, perhaps.  Some neurotypical people, for instance, struggle with eye contact, or friendships.  But there's a world of difference between being neurotypical and neurodiverse. 

    Out of interest, what traits and behaviours do you exhibit?  What is it that convinces you that you're autistic?  Have you taken the AQ test?

    It's interesting, but I've never thought that it's blatantly obvious.  Not with everyone.  Of course, though, many high-functioning people have had lifetimes of learning to behave neurotypically.  They've gotten used to wearing masks, and can often wear them so well that they're undetectable.  Since my diagnosis, though, I've told people - and have often received responses like 'That doesn't surprise me' or 'I had my suspicions', etc.  So maybe it is quite obvious.  Just not always, it seems, to so-called 'experts'. 

    To be honest, it's only such experts who've ever made me feel fobbed off.  I'd return to your GP if you're serious about looking into a diagnosis.