Published on 12, July, 2020
Shutdowns are part of life. There are multiple root causes for a shutdown, including the result of sensory overload, physical and mental exhaustion, unexpected news, anxiety about an upcoming event, and upheaval in our schedule. Sometimes it comes in combination; other times it comes down to simply being “on” for so long, that we have no choice but to turn “off.”
Are you always aware that you are about to go into "shutdown"?
What strategies to you use to help recover from them?
How do you "resurface"
How do you describe what they are to others and try to manage their occurrence?
I'm sorry I couldn't join in today, seem to be becoming a bit non-lingual. I was supposed to have a bass lesson this morning but when I got there no one was home. I sent a message and came home where I hid on the sofa with my head under a cushion. Think I've spent most of the last two days like that and I feel like I'm falling over a non specific edge. One of my gardening people became ill with cancer several months ago and has been in a care home recently, I have a key to the garden door and have been continuing to look after it. He died on Sunday and I only found out because I ran into the towns most talented house painter, who I run into at several houses, so we have odd conversations here and there.
I'm such an outsider but not alone. I spend my days alone at the end of the garden but I haven't been able to paint for the best part of a month. There is a massive crack in the pavement and I am falling down it. I realised a while ago that I don't like the feeling of a shower on my skin, having showered for years because that's what you do, now I only get in the bath and bury my ears under the water. I realise this is a non sensicle ramble but at least it is words. The bleakness of Dartmoor would suit me just fine at the moment, only visited Exmoor once, Two Rivers - there's a real proper cotton rag paper mill there, I bought some it's possibly the best paper anywhere. I'd happily live near Exmoor. Have a good day tomorrow people. x
Ooooooh Spotty
so sorry to hear that you are having such a rough time. Really sad news about the passing of one of your gardeners. You must be feeling so raw and hypersensitive/aware to everthing at the moment which is why I can totally understand the need to lock down and protect yourself in your tortoise shell.
outside space is good as it creates sufficient space between us and the rest of the world and takes some of the anxiety out of the day to day.
glad you posted though as at least it means that you are trying to reach out. Is there anything I can do to help?
Thank you Elephant, Just being here and giving a monkeys is a big help and I thank you for it. It is comforting to read everyone's thoughts even we are not up to joining in.
I hope your meeting goes/went well too. Time to make myself eat something and attempt a more positive afternoon.