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Article in The Daily Mail - views?

Lotus

I just read an article on the daily mail website about an autistic young man called Julius Lette who is an actor. His mother reports how it was suggested by two other mothers with autistic sons (on this website) that they each should   find a prostitute for their sons to experience "the joy of sex" as she put it. She even drove around looking for one until she thought better of it!

It appears that this poor deluded woman, driven to despair when her son appeared to lose all confidence due to not being able to find a girlfriend, seemed to think that sex with a stranger would give him some confidence. I'm a female Aspie so I can't speak from a male viewpoint, but from what I've heard from Aspie men, I believe that most would only want to have sex with someone who loves them - how can having sex with someone who is paid to do it raise confidence? And would they not get attached to her and then be upset that the attachment was not reciprocal?

This is a very personal issue, and I don't feel that this woman had the right to either try to buy someone to have sex with her son or to write about it in a national newspaper - even if it is supposedly to raise awareness about autism and how disabled people have a need for sex and relationships too (being described as "disabled" makes my blood boil!) 

If any autistic adults reading this have a view about this article I would be interested to hear what you think. Maybe parents of autistic young people might read your comments and gain more insight into how to better support their sons - and daughters too (funny how nobody worries if they are not having sex??)

Parents
  • Former Member
    Former Member

    I found up the article after reading your post. The article is about a mother who considered hiring a prostitute for her young son who is on the spectrum. Presumably because SHE doubted he would ever have sex by any other means.

    I can’t help but therefore wonder if the desire for her son to have sex may have been originating more from the mum than from the son?

    I am supportive of most endeavours which seek to respectfully raise acceptance of, awareness of, normalise and value Autism. However, in my opinion, this is not necessarily a good example of any of these.

    And I am struggling to get my head around this situation; because there are literally thousands of people who are still Virgins at 21, NDs and NTs. And this situation feels, to me, to be derogatory to ND young people as, if her son did not have ASD, would she have considered going to a Prostitute then? I would have thought it may have been more supportive to reassure her son that he will meet someone when the time is right, just as he eventually did.

    I understand her fear that her son may not find happiness with a partner; however, this is not a fear which is exclusive for those on the spectrum. All mums want their children to be happy and find someone who loves them. But this situation was not about her son finding happiness or being loved, this was about her son having sex. With a woman his mother considered arranging and paying to do so.

    I am not an avid supporter of Prostitution or Pornography. I am practical and realistic, and therefore support both activities taking place safely for all involved. However, I personally feel they are both the products of a Patriarchal, Capitalist society in which love, feelings, respect and care have been severed from sex for purely commercial gains. (And, just for the record, I don’t think I am a total prude as I am not a great fan of Monogamy either.)

    With this is mind, I wonder what messages her son may have learnt had she had arranged a prostitute for him; that he must pay for sex, that he is not worthy of finding someone who wants to have sex with him for free?

    Sex is overrated. And, because sex can be ‘bottled’ and then sold, it has been. Whereas care, respect and affection, which cannot be so easily commercialised, are underrated as a direct result.

    And, therefore I openly question further; [why] should the question of the (legitimate) use of Prostitutes be a different question for NDs than NTs?

Reply
  • Former Member
    Former Member

    I found up the article after reading your post. The article is about a mother who considered hiring a prostitute for her young son who is on the spectrum. Presumably because SHE doubted he would ever have sex by any other means.

    I can’t help but therefore wonder if the desire for her son to have sex may have been originating more from the mum than from the son?

    I am supportive of most endeavours which seek to respectfully raise acceptance of, awareness of, normalise and value Autism. However, in my opinion, this is not necessarily a good example of any of these.

    And I am struggling to get my head around this situation; because there are literally thousands of people who are still Virgins at 21, NDs and NTs. And this situation feels, to me, to be derogatory to ND young people as, if her son did not have ASD, would she have considered going to a Prostitute then? I would have thought it may have been more supportive to reassure her son that he will meet someone when the time is right, just as he eventually did.

    I understand her fear that her son may not find happiness with a partner; however, this is not a fear which is exclusive for those on the spectrum. All mums want their children to be happy and find someone who loves them. But this situation was not about her son finding happiness or being loved, this was about her son having sex. With a woman his mother considered arranging and paying to do so.

    I am not an avid supporter of Prostitution or Pornography. I am practical and realistic, and therefore support both activities taking place safely for all involved. However, I personally feel they are both the products of a Patriarchal, Capitalist society in which love, feelings, respect and care have been severed from sex for purely commercial gains. (And, just for the record, I don’t think I am a total prude as I am not a great fan of Monogamy either.)

    With this is mind, I wonder what messages her son may have learnt had she had arranged a prostitute for him; that he must pay for sex, that he is not worthy of finding someone who wants to have sex with him for free?

    Sex is overrated. And, because sex can be ‘bottled’ and then sold, it has been. Whereas care, respect and affection, which cannot be so easily commercialised, are underrated as a direct result.

    And, therefore I openly question further; [why] should the question of the (legitimate) use of Prostitutes be a different question for NDs than NTs?

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