Hi
I was diagnosed in May this year aged 46.
I referred myself for a diagnosis after many years of suspecting something was going on due to family and colleagues joking about my autistic behaviours.
I support people with autism at work and was always able to see and understand more than others why certain people felt a certain way or displayed behaviours as a result of something. That understanding came from my own difficulties and feelings from situations I experienced and could match that to those I supported.
Following the meeting, I was expecting a positive outcome of an autistic diagnosis as this would tick all the boxes that I had questions for regarding many aspects of my life.
When the confirmation came that I had high functioning autism it was both expected and a shock. What surprised me most was the shock aspect of it. It hit me like a ton of bricks and took weeks to come to terms with it. It was something I never expected to feel. It was meant to be relief and understanding. Instead I went through a whole grieving process as my life replayed out in my head and all those situations I've struggled suddenly had a whole new aspect to them.
What I'd like to know is, for others who were diagnosed later in life, did the confirmation of autism help/hinder/improve/devastate you in any way?
Now I'm getting used to my label, I think it will help me. I've told my managers about it and as now they understand some of my complexities around certain things I do. I get certain allowances now which I felt I didn't get before.
I've not shared the news with anyone else. Not out of shame, but because I'm still me and once people know about the label, I don't want people thinking they have to be different around me or not be themselves when they joke about the things I do.
Regards, Lee
