I'm Autistic with ADHD, I also suffer depression and anxiety.
I'm long-term unemployed (nine years) and I'm on ESA-WRAG. I'm beyond desperate to get back into work as I just can't manage financially the way things are, work is also a benefit to my overall health.
My ability to work is limited by problems getting through interviews due to autism, I've also no way of explaining my unemployment without disclosure and to an employer a long-term unemployed disabled person just isn't appealing! To be honest I don't know what work I can do or if I can work any more.
I was forced into a work placement in a call centre a few years ago, completely unsuitable placement for an Autistic person, this resulted in a massive meltdown so severe it caused severe regression in autism symptoms. It was so bad it caused serious anxiety attacks over just being in the same room as a phone. This event has done more to prevent my getting back into work than anything else.
So...
I need to volunteer get recent work experience and references, also to find out if I can cope in work. I've not been able to get volunteer work in the past as I've had no references, not even personal references, but I found a way around that and now I have managed to get myself volunteer work.
I'm volunteering for two places currently (three hours each, one one-to-one training and one may involve using a telephone), I've three other charities interested in my volunteering for them.
I'm scared of telling anyone because I'm scared they'll punish me for it - I know I'm allowed to do volunteer work on ESA but I also know that the job center and DWP will make me pay for it somehow.
I'm scared they'll see the type of volunteer work I'm doing - that I'm trying to have more social interaction and trying to get over my phone phobia - and decide I shouldn't be on ESA any more.
I've not been invited to the job center for a while so I'm scared of making contact in case it triggers them making me go in every week (which I can't afford), or in case they decide to put me on some useless course and make me stop my volunteering. I can't call DWP as then they'll decide I can use a phone so accuse me of lying or if I can't use a phone when they want they'll use it to sanction me.
- Should I wait until they next call me to the job center to tell them I volunteer?
- Would I be punished for not telling them sooner?
I'm just absolutely TERRIFIED of what they're going to do if I tell them I'm volunteering...but I'm equally as scared of what they could do if I don't tell them!
